


I Know Kid

by GrapieBee



Category: Undertale
Genre: Body Horror, Dreams and Nightmares, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Other, Past Child Abuse, Post-Pacifist Route, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-04
Updated: 2016-01-10
Packaged: 2018-05-04 20:11:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 25,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5347061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrapieBee/pseuds/GrapieBee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When your dreams become nightmares and your nightmares begin to feel like memories, who can you call on for help? DISCONTINUED</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Nightmares

The first thing Frisk becomes aware of is the fact that they are walking.

Their path is narrow and winding, a cold and oppressive chill surrounds them, making it hard to breathe. They stare at their feet as they walk in the near darkness, one in front of the other, on and on and on and on and-

The air was eerily still and quiet around them. Their feet make no noise against the ground. They can’t help but feel a sense of dread looming over them that is nearly palpable.  
After some time, they notice a weight in their right hand. They peered over to find that their hand clutched a knife that was discolored with rust and dried blood. They feel as if they should be frightened by this, as they do not recall where the knife nor blood came from.

All they are able to feel is the weight of their sins creeping up their back.

“…why…”

They stop abruptly at the sound of a soft voice.

“…why…?”

It was strained, as if the speaker was taking great effort just to get a single word out.

“…why would you do this…?”

The voice had slowly begun to surround them as it echoed off walls they could not see.

“…why would you kill us…?”

Frisk began to realize that it was not an echo that they had been hearing, but hundreds of other voices all around them chiming in, asking the same question over and over and over. Frisk covered their ears as the voices grew louder and louder, their eyes searching the room frantically, trying to see who was there with them.

“…W H Y…”

Frisk took a step back and immediately regretted doing so. It was as if someone had switched a large overhead lamp on, causing Frisk to shield their eyes for several seconds from the near blinding light. As their eyes grew accustomed to the light and they could fully view the room, a cold pit grew in their stomach at the sight of what was in front of them.

“…W H Y…”

Hundreds of familiar faces surrounded them. Monsters they had come to love dearly, all of them in varying stages of death. Hands and paws and claws reached out for them, fingers flaking off as they slowly turned to dust. The monster’s wails of pain and anguish assaulted their ears. It made them feel sick to their stomach.

“…W H Y…”

Toriel stared at them with such distain in her eyes, such unadulterated hatred. Her lower jaw broke off to scatter into dust as she opened her mouth to ask the same question over and over again.

“…W H Y…”

Papayrus’s body cradled its own head at chest level, his voice full of an uncharacteristic disappointment that wrenched at Frisk’s heart.

“…W H Y…”

Undyne was barely recognizable to Frisk. She was more of a half formed mass then the monster they knew. Her arms bent and swayed in a disturbingly unnatural manner as she reached out to them. Her one good eye lost any remaining shape it might have had as she stared at them; Frisk watched in silent horror as Undyne’s eye slowly slid down her cheek, falling with a sickening thwap onto the floor. The empty socket continued to stare at them, sending chills down their spine.

“…W H Y…”

Sans stared at them, the left side of his face and eye engulfed in a ferociously hot blue flame. There was what looked like a deep slash across his chest, blood and dust spilling from the wound equally, the two substances coagulating together into some sort of grotesque fluid that left a thick, red trail behind him as Sans drew closer and closer.

“…W H Y…”

The question grew louder and louder with each iteration of it, until Frisk’s very bones shook from the force of it all.

They pressed their hands as hard as they could against their ears, closing their eyes as they crouched to the floor, wanting nothing more than to make themselves as small as they could.  
As quickly as the noise had started, the deafening silence from before was back, leaving the rapid beat of their heart the only thing Frisk could listen to.  
They tentatively opened their eyes and lowered their hands from their ears.

As they slowly stood back up, they felt someone roughly yank the knife from their hand. Before they even had a chance to react, they felt a sickening pain as the knife sank deeply into their side and was twisted mercilessly.

From their peripherals, they could see a pair of bright eyes, accompanied with a smile that was more frightening than genuine.

“Yeah Frisk, why would you kill all of your friends?”

Frisk jolted awake, their entire body covered in a cold sweat that had soaked through their pajamas and sheets. Their breathing was sharp and fast. Their heart was still pounding in their ears as they clutched at their side, checking for signs of a wound. There was no hole, no blood, no nothing. The site itself was hot to the touch and throbbed with a muted, discomforting pain.

They lay there for several very long minutes as they did their best to bring their breathing and heart rate under control. The gruesome details of their nightmare clung to their mind, filling them with a very specific combination of dread and sadness that made their heart feel as if it were too full and too empty all at once.

Frisk slowly sat up once their heartbeat returned to its normal cadence. They continued to tenderly hold at their side as they pulled the blankets off of themselves and scooted out of the bed.  
With a soft click Frisk turned on the desk lamp, filling their small but tidy room with a comfortable light. They quietly slide open the bottom most drawer, pulling out a spiral bound notebook and pencil. Flipping it open, they turned to the most recently written in page and, as neatly as they could, wrote the date towards the center of the page before they began to write.

I had that nightmare again. I…I actually had it twice tonight. It’s the same thing over and over again. It keeps getting more detailed each time I go to sleep. These nightmares have begun to feel and look too real. But I don’t know why they should. I’ve never seen Toriel look at anyone like she has looked at me in these nightmares. In all the resets I had to do in the underground, Sans never looked so fearsome or upset. I can’t recall ever seeing Papyrus look disappointed in anyone! But his expression is so…consistent each time I dream, I don’t know how my mind would be able to make something like that up without having seen it at least once before.

Frisk paused for a moment to rub at their burning eyes. Looking at the clock, they were entirely displeased to see that the red numbers read 4:35am. It had only been an hour since they had last been awoken by an eerily similar nightmare.

Undyne…I’ve read that monsters turn to dust when they die. But she… she looked like she was made of wax. Like something was melting her from the inside out. She looked like she was in so much pain…  
They paused again, doing their best to swallow past a lump that had formed in their throat.

I never ever even raised a hand to hurt a single monster. Never. Not even once. But that knife. It…the weight of it was not unfamiliar in my hand. I…I don’t know what to do. This is the fourth night in a row that this has happened, the first where I’ve woken up more than once. I don’t know why I keep seeing these awful things. I don’t know why these things feel so real. Why the more I have these dreams, the less they feel like dreams and more like some sort of horrible memory. I am really frightened. But I don’t know how to ask for help or even who to ask help from. No one remembers the resets. I mean, not really. I think Sans might have known something weird was going on, but I have no way of knowing how much he’s remembered.

Their hand was shaking at this point, the normally neat handwriting turning into a jagged scrawl.

I can’t ask anyone for help. I just can’t. I can do this. I just have to stay determined. That’s all.

With a decisive movement, Frisk shut the notebook and carefully put it back where they had gotten it from. They clicked the light off and clambered back into bed.  
They rubbed at their side, the throbbing now only a faint tingling sensation, as they did their best to try and forget about their nightmare.

Watching the alarm clock as the time slowly went by, knowing that they would not get anymore sleep that night, it filled Frisk with determination.

\-----------------------------

Ten Days Later

\-----------------------------

The shrill ring of his cell phone startled Sans awake, his hands fumbling with the small device from where it had been on the side table. Sans stared at the lit screen of his phone for a moment, managing to register the flashing “Tori” ID name before he answered.

“Tori, I do hope you understand how important these afternoon naps are in maintaining my oh-so important beauty regiment.” He immediately started in on the sarcasm, as per usual with their conversations.  
What was not usual was the pregnant pause from the monster on the other end of the line.

“…Tori?”

A shaky sigh was the only response.

“Tori, what’s wrong?”

Sans was fully awake at this point, his short legs dangled just above the floor over the edge of the bed.

“…Frisk apparently did not go to school today. As you know, I do not keep my phone on while I am teaching the monster children here in my home. I checked my phone right after class was done to find that Frisk’s school has left several messages asking where they were today."

There was another shaking sigh before she continued.

“Sans, Frisk is not picking up their phone. I…I am frightened that something has happened to them. They have been acting so strangely this past week. I just…I do not know what to t-think.” Her voice wavered only with her last word, but it was enough for Sans to know that his friend was on the verge of panic.

“Have you called anyone else yet? Has anyone else seen them?” He was on his feet at this point, slipping on a sweatshirt and rummaging around in a still unpacked box for his only pair of sneakers.

“N-no. I have been out trying to find them. I have visited all of their favorite places that I know of. I have spoken with the neighbors. N-no one seems to recall seeing them after they had left the house this morning.”

He was quick to navigate through the few remaining boxes in the apartment, being mindful not to trip as he went.

“Tori, do a favor for me?”

“Y-yes Sans?”

“Take a deep breath.”

Sans listened as she took three deep, shuddering breaths.

“Better?” He asked as he locked the front door to the apartment that he and Papyrus shared.

“A little.”

“Glad I can provide a much needed service in these troubling times.” The edge of sarcasm in his voice earned him a weak giggle from Toriel.

“In all seriousness though, I’m on my way to help look for the kid. Where are you now?”

“I’m near the Nice Cream stand that has been set up over on Lexdale Street. Do you know where that is?”

“I do. I’ll be there before you know-”

He paused mid-sentence, suddenly lost in and uneasy feeling.

“Sans, are you still there?” Toriel asked after a moment or two.

He snapped back to attention.

“Sorry Tori, spaced there for a sec. Hey, uh, you said the kid’s been acting strange, right? Like, how strange?”

“I…I do not know how to put my finger on it Sans. They just don’t seem like their normal, happy self lately. They seem so tired and, though I know they already do not talk very much, they have spoken less and less the past week or so. I tried to ask them yesterday before they left for school about it, but by the time I got the nerve to start asking them what was wrong, they had excused themselves and were gone. Oh Sans, I wish I had just asked them what was troubling them so much, they mi-“

“Tori,” Sans interrupted her, “don’t sweat it now. I bet the kid has a good reason to not be picking up their phone or why they didn’t go to school today. You remember their third day of school? How they wanted to walk all by themselves and got distracted with playing with a stray dog for half the day? Kid’s got a big heart; short attention span sometimes, but a big heart.”

That warranted a full on chuckle from Toriel, much to Sans’ relief.

“I can bet you it was something like that. You know what, I’ll check the park where we found them last time on my way to you. I bet they’re making friends with another stray animal. Why don’t you call the others up while I head over there and check it out?”

“I would appreciate that. I will call Frisk’s friends and see if any of them have seen them today. I will text you if I get any information.”

“Sounds good, catch you soon Tori.”

Sans was about to hang up when he caught a soft,

“Sans?”

“Yeah Tori?”

“…thank you.”

“You’re welcome Tori.”

He hung up the phone, pocketing it as he crossed the street in the late afternoon light.

————————————————————————-

The park in question was less of a park and more of a stretch of partially wooded, grassy sloping area that lay near the south side of the city. It was an easy walk from Sans’ apartment and an even easier walk from the townhouse that Frisk and Troiel lived in.

Sans knew there was a particular spot at the pond that Frisk enjoyed that had a very big, very old weeping willow at the water’s edge. Frisk was pretty tight lipped about why they liked the spot so much, but Sans had a pretty good suspicion that it had something to do with the family of ducks that had settled nearby. That and very few people ever bothered the spot.

He was fast approaching where the tree stood, its branches in full bloom, several of the tips floating along the top of the pond.

“Frisk?” He called.

He began checking around the tree and near the water’s edge.

“Hey kid, if you’re here, let me know. If you’re playing with another stray dog, that’s good and all. But you’ll be barking up the wrong tree soon enough if you keep forgetting to go to school!” Sans, of course, was delighted with his pun, ill placed as it was.

At that moment, he heard a soft sniffle from beneath the low hanging branches of the tree.

“Kid?”

Another sniffle.

Sans carefully pushed aside the wall of blossomed branches, peeking his head inside the canopy. Legs drawn up to their chest, their head resting on top their knees was how Sans found Frisk. They sat, cradled in the exposed roots of the willow, their face turned away from him.

Sans’ usual smile faltered for a moment. There were no animals, just Frisk and their small school bag. He stepped through the canopy wall, letting the branches fall back into place behind him.

“Hey kid, Tori gave me a call, said you hadn’t gone to school and weren’t picking up your phone. From the looks of it, this isn’t like last time where you made a new dog friend. What’s up? She’s been pretty worried about you.”

Frisk pulled their knees in tighter to their chest, their shoulders shaking ever so slightly.

Silently, Sans walked along the roots, settling in next to Frisk once he had gotten close enough.

“Kid…what’s wrong?”

At this point, Frisk turned their head so that their eyes met. Sans did his best to stifle any shock that might have bled into his features.

To put it as kindly as he could, Sans thought the kid looked like a hot mess. There were heavy bags under their eyes. What little of their eyes he could see were blood shot and red, their face tear stained, their sleeves covered in snot.

“Frisk…”

Frisk adverted their eyes from him.

“Frisk, what’s wrong?”

Frisk turned their head away from Sans once more.

“Frisk…I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s wrong. If you can’t talk to me, that’s fine, but you have to talk to someone. Please Frisk, let’s get you to Tori and you can-“

“I can’t.”

It was soft and barely audible, but it was most certainly Frisk who said those words.

“I can’t Sans. I…I don’t know how to explain what’s wrong. Even if I did, I don’t think anyone would believe me.”

A cold feeling filled the non-existent pit of Sans’ stomach. Those words hit way, way too close to home for his liking.

“Kid just… just try me, ok?”

Frisk turned their head back towards Sans, tears standing ready to fall from the corners of their eyes. They took a deep breath and raised their head from their knees.

“Sans have you…have you ever had a dream that you know couldn’t be real? But it felt too real? Felt so real that you started to think maybe it wasn’t really a dream?”

A cold panic began to fill Sans.

“I...kid, Frisk, please, where are you going with this?”

Frisk twisted their hands together in a nervous manner, but they continued.

“I keep having the same dream. I-I really shouldn’t even call it a dream, it’s a nightmare. The worst nightmare I’ve ever had. Again and again and again. I’ve been having this dream since we all came to the surface, or at least I feel like I have. The details started off hazy, but each night I keep seeing more and more Sans. It’s gotten so bad the last two weeks. I…I…”

Frisk began to cry as they swallowed loudly, their voice breaking as they continued.

“I keep seeing you die. I keep seeing mom die. And Undyne and Papayrus a-and everyo-one. Everyone e-every night. I can hear them crying, I can feel their dust fall through my fingers, I-I’ve watched Undyne melt so many times n-now. T-the worst part, i-is that I have t-this feeling that…t-that I’m the one who did it! T-that I k-keep killing everyone I love. T-there’s always a knife in my hand Sans. It’s a-always covered in b-blood and I never know how it g-gets there a-and…and-“

Frisk wiped at the tears streaming down their face with a still damp sleeve, hands shaking.

“I c-can’t sleep. I d-don’t want to. I don’t want to s-see that anymore. I d-don’t want to keep s-seeing you die. To see a-anyone die. I c-can’t Sans. I j-just can’t. I’m s-so tired all the t-time now. My h-head’s tired. My heart is t-tired. My v-very soul is tired. I don’t know what t-to do and I d-didn’t know w-who I could ask and y-you must think I-I’m crazy a-anyways at this point and I just-“  
Frisk is not given the chance to finish their sentence as Sans picks them up in one fell swoop, holding them tightly to his chest. Frisk could immediately feel how violently his shoulders shook. They could feel as a wet spot formed on their back from where Sans’ own tears fell. Could hear a rumble in his chest as sobs racked his body. Could hear how wet and weak his voice sounded as he offered a few soft words.

“I know kid…I know.”

Frisk felt part of the heaviness that had been plaguing their heart since returning to the surface lifted away at the sound of those words.

Frisk, in the same way that they knew their dreams weren’t really just dreams, knew that Sans was telling them the truth. He knew. He inherently understood what no other being, monster or human, could.  
It was at that point that they buried their face deeply into the soft material of Sans’ sweatshirt and unabashedly sobbed. They had cried so much already and yet their heart ached anew.  
“I’m so sorry!” Frisk chocked out the words through their sobs. They repeated the words over and over until it turned into a mantra.

Sans simply hugged them tighter and rubbed at their back with a shaking hand.

“I know kid…I know.”  
——————————————————  
Sans sat in the crook of a willow root, Frisk still cradled to his chest. The kid had cried themselves to sleep, exhausted in a way that Sans knew no child should be.

Sans’ phone vibrated from where it had sat quietly in his pocket for over an hour. It took the second round of vibrations for him to realize what was making the noise. He had fished the device from his pocket just as the third vibration finished. The phone was half way done with its fourth and final vibration before he answered.

“Sans, did you manage to get yourself lost again? I can give you the address if you need to use your phone’s map again!”

Sans remained silent. The lump in his throat was too big for him to talk without his voice cracking.

“…Sans?”

He sighed before he answered.

“Hi T-Tori.”

Just as he had thought, his voice had cracked in the most uncharacteristic manner.

“Sans, are you ok? Did you find Frisk?”

“Y-yeah Tori, I did.”

“…I-Is something wrong? Why do you sound like you are cr-“

“They’re ok Tori. Frisk is fine. I really didn’t mean to worry you. I-I’m just…”

He didn’t know how to finish.

“Sans, please…what is wrong?” Toriel asked in a voice no louder than a whisper.

Sans was quiet for a moment.

“I don’t have the words to explain it over the phone. Would you…would it be ok if we meet you at your place? Please?”

“Y-yes, absolutely! I will head over there right now.”

“Alright Tori. I’ll catch you in a few.”

He pulled the phone away from his face, watching the screen blink as Toriel hung up on the call. He pocketed the device once again and stood up, being very careful not to wake Frisk.

As Sans walked out from the canopy of the weeping willow, he began to try and find the words he would need to explain to Toriel what was happening to her beloved child.


	2. Theory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans and Toriel talk.

Toriel all but ran down the streets in the late afternoon light, doing her best the hastily apologize to anyone she bumped into on her way, her ears flopping heavily against her shoulders.

As she approached her home, she slowed to a trot which quickly slowed to a brisk walk as she caught sight of a familiar skeleton on her doorstep. Sans sat on the stoop of the townhouse, Frisk curled up in his lap asleep, their small book bag haphazardly slung over his shoulder. As he caught her eye, he gave her a weak wave and smile.

Her stomach dropped as she grew even closer and could clearly his face. It was evident that he had been crying and had only finished a short while ago. 

“S-Sans, thank you so much for finding them.” She said as she tried to catch her breath, quickly walking up the stairs.

His eyes adverted from hers as he stood up, careful to not wake the small human in his arms.

“It’s no big deal.” Sans said quietly as he stepped aside, making room so Toriel could unlock the door.

As they stepped into the house, Sans let the book bag slide off of his shoulder and onto the floor, shuffled into the living room and gently placed Frisk onto the nearby couch. They snuggled into the deep cushions and sighed contentedly. Sans stuffed his hands into the pockets of his sweatshirt, a small sigh escaping him.

“Sans…please tell me what is going on.”

Sans turned on his heels to face her, the smile on his face not meeting his eyes at all.

“Tori, I need you to promise me something before I start.”  
“Certainly Sans, what is it?”

“I need you to keep an open mind and to take what I’m going to say as fact, regardless of how fictitious any of it may sound.”

Toriel wrung her hands worriedly, not able to ignore the tired look in Sans eyes.

“I…I promise Sans. Please just-“

She was interrupted as Frisk shifted in their sleep, rolling themselves over to face the back of the couch, grunting as they did so.

“…let us continue this in the kitchen, if that is no issue?” 

Sans shrugged in response and followed Toriel into the kitchen/dining room area, sitting himself into one of the mismatched chairs of the kitchen table.

Tori sat across from him, carefully adjusting her skirt and crossing her legs as she did so. There was a strained silence that hung in the air, only the soft ‘tik-tock’ of the nearby wall clock to fill it. 

“Sans,” Tori began, keeping her volume low,“…please, I am worried about Frisk. If you can shed any light as to what happened today, you must tell me.”

Sans continued to stare at a nondescript corner of the floor.

“San-“

“I’m sorry Tori, I’m trying to think of where to start. I’m not trying to make you wait, I just-”

Sans paused, lost in thought for a moment more.

“Tori, did you ever wonder why Frisk never died in the Underground?”

Toriel couldn’t help the confused look that crossed her face.

“What?! Sans I am not really sure why you are asking that, can you-can you-?”

She was at a loss for words at that point and had devolved to simple making ‘give me more information’ hand gestures.

Sans turned his attention back to her.

“Tori, have you ever thought about what they did? What they must have gone through? Who they fought? Did you ever wonder how they managed to do all that? They’re only a kid after all; doesn’t it all seem a little strange?”

Toriel met Sans eyes for a moment before turning her gaze to where her hands lay clasped on the table top.

“I…I unfortunately cannot say that I gave it more than a passing thought. I was so happy to see everyone free, to feel the sunshine again…to have a family. I suppose that makes me pretty selfish, doesn’t it?” 

“…it’s not really my place to judge you on that, Tori. Regardless about whether or not you’ve given it thought before, I’m going to have to ask you to start doing so.”

Sans peeked out the kitchen doorway to where Frisk still lay peacefully sleeping on the couch in the room over.

“Frisk is just a kid. How could they have survived an encounter with every Monster in the Underground? Some of which had never even seen a human before, let alone knowing how to act around one. They would have had to be extremely lucky to survive everyone that was down there. But, Tori, I don’t really think their success in all of this has anything to do with luck.”

Sans pulled a hand out of his pocket to scratch at the back of his head.

“Tori…do you remember the experiments that Alphys was doing? The ones that involved what she calls ‘Determination’?”

The pit in Tori’s stomach fell out with such a sudden violence that she felt nauseous for a moment.

“I unfortunately do. But Sans, what does any of that have to do with Frisk?”

Sans, done with the itch on his head, took to rubbing at the back of his neck.

“I know you never read through any of Dr. Alphys’ notes in regards to what happened in that lab. But I did. I read all of it. In doing so, I learned something about this stuff that she pumped into those Monsters. Tori, Determination is made naturally in humans. It’s how a lot of them are able to survive serious injuries, how some can keep going regardless of what is happening to them, how their souls can persist so long after they’ve died. There’s evidence that some monsters may be able to produce it naturally as well, but nowhere near the same amount that a human can. Not even close. I’ve had a theory for a while now, but I didn’t really have much of anything to back it up with until today.”

Sans tucks his hand back into his pocket.

“Tori…I’m lead to believe that if a human wants it badly enough, has the will power, that they can use their Determination to bring themselves back from being, well, dead.”

“Sans, that is certainly an interesting theory. But you still haven’t explained why any of this pertains to Frisk!” Tori said, leaning forward; her concern for her human child outweighing her normally polite mannerisms as her tone became curt.

“I know, I’m sorry, I’m getting there.” Sans said, exhaustion evident in his voice.

Toriel sat back once more, wringing her hands together in a sheepish manner, slightly embarrassed by her small outburst.

“Knowing everything that I do, I’m convinced that Frisk died quite a few times in the Underground, Tori. I think they were filled with enough Determination to keep bringing themselves back again and again and again and again.”

Sans’ voice became hushed at this point.

“I think, in doing what they did, they’re starting to see some sort of cosmic backlash in refusing to stay dead.”

His shoulders slumped visibly as he continued.

“They…they had been crying when I found them today Tori. They told me about how they keep having the same dream, the same nightmare, over and over again. How they keep seeing you, me, Papyrus, everyone dying. How they felt like it couldn’t just be a dream. That is was all too real to be made up. I know this may sound weird, but I believe them Tori. I one hundred percent believe that what they’re seeing in their dreams aren’t dreams, but some sort of memory.”

Sans sank deeper into the chair, his shoulders hunching forward, unconsciously making himself appear smaller. 

“I…had dreams like that too, when we lived in the Underground. I kept having the weirdest sense of déjà vu about everything, about every conversation, every interaction. All the time. It was like I was having the exact same dream every night, knowing that it was the same when I woke up, but not being able to remember the details…”

He drew one knee up to his chest, resting the bottom of his heel on the chair seat.

“If Frisk is going through anything like I did, I can attest to how, uh…bad that sort of thing can be. It’s…not exactly a fun thing to experience…”

Sans turned his attention back to Toriel, the look on her face filling him with an uncomfortable embarrassment that sat in his throat like a red hot ball of nickel. Her eyes were watery with the beginnings of tears, her hands clutched together in front of her chest, her mouth hung partially open.

“Oh Sans, I’m so sorry. I wish I had known. I wish I could have helped yo-“

“Hey, there’s no need to get into what happened to me. It’s ok. It’s done and over with, right? I told you all of this to try and give you an idea of what Frisk might be going through. To give you some context to why they’re acting the way they are. So just. Don’t feel bad for me. I’ll be fine. But the kid, Tori, we need to figure out what we can do for them.”

Toriel held the palms of her hands to her eyes, trying her best no to cry.

“This is a lot to take in Sans. I want more than anything to help Frisk, but where would we even start? Where can I begin to try to help them?”

At this point, Sans set his foot back on the floor, sat up in his chair, and lent forward.

“Hey, Tori, look at me.”

Toriel moved her hands from her still watery eyes, pressing them against her cheeks instead.

“This is a lot to take in, especially all at once. I’ve been reading up on this stuff for a while now and I still don’t have my head wrapped around it completely. But we’ll figure something out. I can always look through Alphys’ work again…maybe I missed something, you know? I mean, who knows what sort of important junk I forgot in my haste to make room for more of my pun-tastic jokes.”

Sans’ small bit of humor warranted him a smile and giggle from the Monster in front of him.

“Thank you Sans. Thank you very much. For patiently explaining this to me, for helping me put my mind at ease. Just, thank you.”

“No problem Tori, I do my best to help where I ca-“

It was at this moment that Sans was interrupted by a loud, pain-filled groan from the other room.  
\-------------------------------------  
Frisk was walking once more, a familiar darkness surrounded them. They could feel their hands clammy with sweat, the weight of a familiar knife missing.

“…why…?”

The question was soft, but clear. With the sound of it, the very fabric of the room shifted around them.

They were now standing by a familiar patch of golden buttercups, the warm rays of the sun beating down on them from above. In the center of the flowers, one stood out from the others. It stood considerably taller than the others, the only one in the patch that was wilted and brown, the petals dried and ready to fall with even the softest of breezes.

“…why would you leave him?”

Frisk turned to the voice and was met with a familiar pair of bright eyes. They belonged to a child who looked like they could only be a year older than Frisk themselves. Their hair was cut in a similar style, their shirt stripped in green and yellow. They were covered in a fine but visible layer of dust. A familiar rusty knife was grasped in their hand.

“What are you-?”

“Why would you leave my only friend down here?”

The child took a slow and deliberate step towards Frisk. Frisk was filled with something very close to terror. This other child’s eyes were too big, too bright, full of unadulterated loathing.

Frisk tried to take a step back, but their feet were firmly held to the ground. Looking down, they could see dozens of hands, dirtied with earth and dust, squeezing painfully at their ankles, not letting them move an inch. Amongst the arms they could see faces of their loved ones half buried amongst the dirt, eyes staring at them, unseeing, on the verge of death. Frisk frantically turned their attention back to the other child.

“Who are yo-?” But before they could even finish their sentence, the other child was in front of them. In one fluid movement, the knife was dug deep into Frisk’s side, the resulting pain like fire ripping into their guts.

“Why would you do that?” Their eyes gleamed even brighter with the question, the knife twisting painfully.

Frisk couldn’t breathe, let alone answer. They were in too much pain. 

“Why would you do that to him FRI-“

“-sk? Frisk?! Hey kid, it’s ok!” 

Frisk’s eyes flew open, darting around the room, unable to focus on any one thing. Their breathing was ragged and harsh, their erratic heartbeat pounding in their ears, a cold sweat soaked the collar of their shirt. Their side burned fiercely in pain. They could still feel the knife twisting in their guts.

They couldn’t see clearly, their eyesight swam, the ceiling spinning above them. They could still see those gleaming eyes so clearly, could see those hands breaking through the earth to claw at their legs, could see the knife plunge into their flesh.

Instinctively their arms flung about, trying to grab onto something, anything that could ground them. That could tell them if they were still dreaming or not. A gentle hand stopped their fist in its tracks, snapping their mind back into sharp focus.

“Frisk, focus bud, it’s just me.”

Their eyes finally began to focus, recognition dawning on them at the sight of San’ face. His face, very much like the ceiling, swam in their vision.

It was in that moment that their stomach decided to churn violently, an intense nausea squeezing at their guts, forcing them to quickly sit up. They cupped a hand to their mouth, but they already knew it was too late to make it to the bathroom as they heaved, their mouth filling up with sour bile and hot vomit. They did their best to keep it in their mouth, but the mess was soon spilling through their fingers, down their arm, down their shirt.

“Frisk, hey, here. Throw up in here.” Sans was gently pushing what Frisk recognized as a bowl that was normally full of decorative wax fruit into their lap. 

Frisk dumped what little of the vomit that was still cupped into their hand into the bowl just as another wave of sickness over took them, their guts and abs cramping painfully as they messed into the bowl. They coughed and gagged against the disgusting taste in their mouth, their eyes tearing and nose running as yet another wave of nausea washed over them. They heaved once more, only a thin trail of bile coming up as they did. They continued to cough for a few moments after, instinctively spitting into the bowl, trying to get the taste out of their mouth. Their eyes continued to water, but they were slowly getting their breathing under control once more as their heart slowed to a more normal pace. 

“Oh, Frisk, sweetheart, let me help you.” Toriel came into Frisk’s line of sight, a warm, dampened dish rag soon wiping away the mess from their face.

The soft fur on her fingers was a welcomed sensation against Frisk’s still sweating forehead as she brushed the bangs out of their eyes. They took a moment to look at her once the rag had been pulled away from their face. The corners of her eyes were red as if she had been recently crying, her smile weak but genuine.

“Do you feel a little better?” She asked them, her hand on the rim of the bowl, ready to take it should they be finished with it.

They nodded and let Toriel take the bowl away from them, watching as she placed it on the coffee table behind her. Frisk pulled a face as they looked down at the wet spots of vomit still coating their shirt.  
They began pulling it off, carful to not let any of the wet part touch the couch. As the shirt got stuck on their head, they could hear Toriel ask softly:

“Sans, would you mind going to get Frisk another shirt? Their room is the first on the left once you reach the top of the stairs.” 

Frisk hardly registered Sans slow footsteps climbing up the house stairs as Toriel finished pulling the shirt over their head, taking a moment to brush her fingers through their hair. There was a long moment of silence between them as Toriel cleaned off their hands and neck, careful to make sure not a drop of vomit remained.

“…I’m so sorry Frisk.” Tori said quietly, gently taking their small hands into her own “Sans…Sans was kind enough to do his best to explain what you told him earlier today. About your dreams, about how you haven’t been sleeping well…I was so worried about you Frisk. When you weren’t picking up your phone, I kept thinking that something horrible had happened.” Tori rubbed at the top of their hands in a soothing gesture. 

“I may not completely understand these dreams you’re having or why they feel so real to you, but Frisk, I want to help you where I am able to. But I cannot read your mind. You have to let me know when you need help, ok?”

Frisk was silent for a long moment, nervously biting at their lip as they thought.

“I’m sorry Mom, I’m really sorry. I didn’t want to worry you. You’ve done so much for me already and you work so hard to help everyone in the neighborhood out, I just wanted you to not have to worry about another thing. I ended up doing that anyways and I’m sorry.”

“My sweet child, it is my job to worry about you. I love you very dearly and I only want to see you happy and well. I happy accepted these responsibilities when you asked to live with me. If you need help, it’s my job to be there to help where I can.”

At this point, Tori tenderly brushed their hair behind their ear.

“If there is something you cannot come and talk to me about immediately, I understand. But please Frisk, please know that I will always be there for you when you are ready for my help.”

Frisk’s heart ached at the tenderness in her voice, the gentle nature that her hands still cupped their own. They smiled brightly at her. Knowing that someone loved them so much, it filled them with determination.

“Thanks mom.”

Tori squeezed their hands tightly before letting go, standing up from where she had sat on the couch just as Sans walked down the stairs, a clean shirt flung over his shoulder.

“I hope you don’t mind me taking as long as I did, I had to make sure I found you the coolest shirt you own.”

With a flourish, Sans held up a deep brown tee-shirt with the words STUD MUFFIN printed across the chest.

Frisk cracked a smile, Tori held a hand to her mouth, stifling a laugh.

“What?! You don’t think the shirt’s too cool for you, do you?” Sans asked with a cheeky grin, tossing it at Frisk.

They were quick to pull on the shirt, happy to be wearing something clean once more.

Toriel clapped her hands together, startling the other two in the room. 

“Today has been tiring, wouldn’t you say? We should end it on a happy note, don’t you think? Sans, if it’s all the same to you, why don’t join Frisk and I for dinner and a sleepover?”  
Sans balked somewhat at the invitation.

“Uh, sure Tori. Let me just call up Papyrus and let him kn-“

“Oh, that’s a good idea too! Will you invite your brother over as well? I think the saying ‘The more the merrier’ applies here pretty well, wouldn’t you?”

Sans can only smile.

“Yeah, I think you may just be right Tori.”

\------------------------------------------

“Wowie! Really Sans? A sleep over party with Frisk and Toriel? This isn’t some elaborate prank…is it?”

Sans could hear his brother’s eyes narrowing in suspicion.

“Honest truth here Pap, no jokes.”

“…then in that case, this is most exciting indeed! I will pack my jammies and be over in no time! I do hope Toriel wants to make spaghetti tonight!”

“I thinks she’s got her heart set on trying to make something different tonight Pap. Something called a calzone.”

“What on earth is that?”

“Ehhh, she made it sound kind of like a pie that’s stuffed with pizza toppings.”

“Well if that’s the case, I don’t see why the filling can’t be spaghetti in some way!”

Sans laughed.

“I’m being serious Sans!”

“I know Pap, I’m sorry, today was just…busy.”

Sans peeks into the kitchen from the living room, catching a glimpse of Frisk and Troiel prepping to make dinner and sighs unconsciously.

“…Sans, you went quiet. Is everything ok?”

“Yeah, sorry. It’s just…”

Sans falls quiet for a moment, contemplating on what to say to his brother and even if it was the right time to say anything to begin with. 

“Pap…”

“Yes Sans?”

“Frisk hasn’t been feeling…really good lately. Would you mind bringing some games with you? I’m sure they’d enjoy playing.”

“Certainly! Fear not Sans, for I, the great Papyrus, will bring over not only the most entertaining of board games, but I will also provide only the most comfortable of blankets that we own to help our human friend feel better. Why, I’ll even bring over my favorite bedtime story too!”

“Thanks bro. I’ll see you soon.”

“I will be there in a jiffy! Oh, and Sans?”

“Yeah Pap?”

“Do you need me to bring you anything? You sound…not so good yourself.”

“…nah Pap, I’m good, thanks though.”

“Well, if you change your mind, you know you can just call me. That’s why we have cell phones!”

“You’re right Papyrus, that’s why we have phones.”

“I know, that’s why I said it first!”

Sans laughed.

“I’ll see you soon Pap.”

“Okie Dokie Sans! See you soon!”

Sans hung up the phone, a smile still on his face.

As he slipped his sneakers off by the front door, he turned his attention to the noise in the kitchen.

He would worry about calling Alphys tomorrow. For tonight, he was going to do his to take Frisk’s mind off of their nightmares. Even if only for a little while.


	3. Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toriel learns about Frisk's past.

Toriel was awakened by her phone alarm at 7:15am sharp. She gently turned the device off as she sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

Yawning, she climbed from her bed, making it up neatly before she moved to the bathroom to complete her morning routine.

Fully dressed, she quickly walked down the stairs, smiling at the scene in the living room.

Papyrus had insisted after dinner on making what he had called a "proper sleepover castle". The results had taken every blanket, chair, couch, and available pillow in the house to complete and had easily overtaken half of the living room, but it had put such a happy smile on Frisk's face that Toriel wouldn't have minded if the project had taken up the whole house. All three still lay in the fort, sound asleep.

She carefully made her way out of the house, being sure to leave a note for Sans and Papyrus that she had stepped out to run an early morning errand. Locking the door behind her, she walked briskly in the early morning light.

It was quite a long walk to make, but she did eventually arrive at her destination. Checking her phone, she was happy to see that she was still early for her 8:30 meeting. Walking up the steeps steps, she entered what she had come to learn was the city's local government building, ducking her head slightly as she did so.

She took the stairs, gently greeting the few employees that she passed that were already there so early in the morning.

Reaching the third floor, she took the dimly lit corridor, stopping in front of the door at the farthest end of the hall, knocking lightly.

"Come in!"

She opened the door, having to duck her head slightly again. The office was small and slightly disheveled, much like the young man who sat behind the desk. He pushed his thick rim glasses back up the bridge of his nose, offering her a smile.

"Good morning Liam." She greeted, returning his smile with a small one of her own.

"Mornin' Ms. Torell."

"I've told you Liam, it's just Toriel."

"Ah, I apologize. Memory's never very good these days." He said, taking a sip of his coffee as he gestured for her to take a seat.

Tori sat down in the nearly too small office chair, carefully placing her purse in her lap once she was settled in.

"Ms. Tor-uh, sorry. Toriel, let me cut to the specifics here. I called you in today to discuss what had been found in regards to Frisk's background. Due to the interesting nature in which Frisk came into your custody, we've had to be more thorough than what policy normally calls for during an adoption process."

Tori sat at up a little bit straighter. She knew that they would be discussing sensitive materials, thus the personal meeting.

But there had been no indication it would involve something like this. Her heart sank a little bit at the thought of having to give Frisk back to their birth parents if it came down to it. She was very quick to quell the feeling though, disgusted with herself as the thought passed through her mind.

"Oh really? Please, tell me what you are able to."

At this point, Liam pulled a folder from one of the top drawer of his desk, setting it in the center of his desk.

"As you know, there was very little information that could be found about Frisk before he-sorry, they found their way to you. No last name to search with, no one coming forward to claim them as a dependent, despite broadcasting their description and face everywhere, no nothing. As of now, they really had no documentation of any kind. On paper, it's like they didn't exist. Of course, not until they waltzed in here and demanded they give a statement on behalf of Monsters."

Toriel and Liam shared a small chuckle over the memory of Frisk marching into the local government office like they owned the place, demanding that they see the adult on duty.

"Now, unfortunately, we still haven't been able to find much. But, I have to warn you, what little we did find isn't...well, it's kind of hard to stomach, in all honesty."

At those words, Liam flipped open the manila folder on his desk, pulling two photographs from it and spinning them so that they faced Tori right-side up.

One was of a large, stone building, most of its roof and south wall collapsed from an apparent fire.

The second photo was the mugshot of an ordinary looking young man, his only defining characteristic being the large bags under his eyes and a heavy looking mustache on his face. Liam pointed first to the picture of the building.

"This building is only about half a mile away from the site that Frisk fell into the Underground from. The damages you see in the photo are very, very recent. Ten bodies were found inside. Nine of which were kids, the oldest we estimate being a girl of approximately fourteen years in age. We haven't been able to identify who most of them are. The few that have been named have all been identified to be part of missing peoples investigations. The task force that's been set up to dig further into this is pretty sure at this point that the unidentifiable bodies are very much like Frisk in that, on paper, they never existed."

"But how...how does something like this even happen? Especially to a child? Where would Frisk's parents have been in all of this?"

Liam leaned back in his chair for a moment, pondering her question.

"You know, from what I understand, there's usually one of two ways someone as young as Frisk gets taken into a situation like this. The child is sold to the trafficking ring or they're born into it."

"Born into it?" The pit in Toriel's stomach grew deeper.

"Yeah. Our city has personally never seen anything like that, but we did have a guy who transferred here a few years ago after a particularly hard case. He'd apparently been a part of a drug bust that also turned into a human trafficking bust too. They had it set up so that any time one of their girls got pregnant, they could sell the child or raise it to be useful else where. The whole opperation had apparently become so self sufficient that they didn't need to abduct people anymore, they just had someone give birth."

Liam gave Tori no time to linger on that dreadful story as he proceeded to bring her attention to the second photo.

"Now this guy, pardon my language here, was a real fuck. Suspected of multiple accounts of human trafficking and child molestation in his early life, he managed to escape any serious jail time due to several technicalities in his case. Once he got out, he up and vanished. No one has seen hide nor hair from him in like, thirty something odd years. Until now that is. His body was identified as one of the ones found in this building. Keep in mind that since so little hard evidence that still exists, it's really hard to paint a picture of what Frisk's life was like before you found them. But, on the bright side, the rest of the adoption process should go much more smoothly that I had originally thought."

Toriel's stomach felt very uneasy by the time the human in front of her had finished.

"I suppose you are not wrong. You will have to forgive me for not jumping for joy at the news though. It's just such an awful thing to hear about. Are you positive that this is where Frisk lived last? That that's the life they must have lived?"

Liam gave a little shrug.

"Honestly, the investigation team says it's inconclusive with just the information they have from the site. Unless Frisk is willing to be questioned about if further, we may never be sure. When you guys first showed up here, we were kind of more concerned with asking them what was going on with the all the Monsters that had showed up out of the blue. Their initial statement has them only making mention of staying in a house on the other side of the Mt. Ebot for a while. They didn't give us much more than that."

They sat in an awkward silence for a moment, only the sound of Liam shuffling the folder back together and placing it back into his desk.

"Though, uh, you left a message for me yesterday? You said you had something to ask about today?"

Toriel nodded.

"I wanted to ask if I might be able to home school Frisk, if only for a little while? I think, especially now knowing a little bit more about where they came from, maybe it was too soon to ask that they join a normal classroom environment. I currently already teach the nearby Monster children basic lessons, so it would not be like I do not know what I'm doing."

"Well, yeah, there isn't issue with that. Though, all home schooling has classes online at this point, you do have access to a computer, right?"

Tori pauses for a long moment before remember how excited Alphys had been last week about setting her household up with a computer system.

"I currently do not have one, but a friend of mine will be over later this week to set something up."

"Good! Let me get the paperwork for you to fill out and we can go from there."

Liam stood up at this point and walked to one of the many filing cabinets in his office, shuffling through them and pulling documents out as he needed them.

"So, is there any reason in particular that you want to switch Frisk over to homeschooling?" Liam asked, shutting the top most drawer of a cabinet, staking the papers together with a few taps against his desk.

"Well... to be honest, Frisk has been having some very awful nightmares as of late. They will not tell me what they are about, but I can tell that they are causing them quite a bit of discomfort. I know that they were so excited to start at their school, but I think it may be best to try and give them the chance to grow accustomed to their new life before they take on the stress of traditional schooling as well."

"Hmmmm, yeah, I can see what you mean. Well, Toriel, if they're having nightmares bad enough to affect their daily life, it may not be a bad idea to get them to see a counselor, you know?"

Digging through the bottom most drawer of his desk, he dug out a piece of paper. Listed on it were names and phone number, all in alphabetical order.

"Now this," he said, flipping the paper over so Tori could properly see it "should help you decide who to take Frisk to. They're all good therapists, but..." he set the paper down at this point and circled three names on the list "...these three specialize in helping traumatized children, especially those who may have dealt with abuse of some kind."

Tori did her best to not let her hand shake as she took the paper from him, folding it up carefully and sticking it in her purse, right next to her phone.

"I know this is probably all a lot to take in. I wish I could have told you some better news."

Toriel sighs and steels her nerves.

"No, it's fine, I'm fine. You said there was still some paperwork I needed to fill out?"

Liam stared at her for a moment before he picked up the pile of papers he had pulled earlier.

"Yeah, let's get this sorted out and I can give the school a call later today about Frisk's status change."

After another half hour or so of filling out paperwork, which had some of the most inane wording Tori had ever seen, she found herself exiting the building, the morning sunlight bright and ready for a new day. Tori had a file in her hand, copies of the documents she had signed and a materials list for Frisk's homeschooling tucked away in it.

She found herself walking much slower on the way home. She had a lot to process before she saw Frisk once more.

\------------------------------------------------

Frisk found themselves sitting in the corner of a bed, back pressed against the wall. They had the sheets wrapped around themselves, shaking but not cold. They could feel that something had happened to them, something uncomfortable, but they could not -did not want to- remember the specifics.

There was a knock on the door. Frisk curled in on themselves further for a moment, only relaxing when they saw who it was.

"Frisk...Frisk are you still awake?" the young girl asked.

"I am..." Frisk said, their voice almost inaudible.

While she, for all intents and purposes, was clean and healthy looking, the young girl's throat and shoulders were visibly bruised, her hands and knees covered in scraps. Gingerly, she shuffled into the room, being careful to close the door behind her as quietly as possible. She clambered on the bed, doing her best to make sure her over sized shirt stayed on her at all times. She sat only a few feet away from Frisk, her own back leaning against the wall.

They sat in silence fro a long time, Frisk's shivering coming and going in spasms.

"You're different from the others Frisk." the young girl said, her voice barely even a whisper.

Frisk peeked at her from where the sheet was still draped over them.

"I've been here for so long Frisk. But you...you were here even before I was. You're younger and you've been through more than I have. Even still, this place hasn't gotten to you like it has the others. Like it has to me. Despite everything you've been through, you're still just you."

Frisk smiled warmly at her kind words.

The young girl turned her full attention to Frisk.

"Frisk, I need you to promise me something."

"...ok."

"Frisk, promise me that you'll always remember that nothing that has ever happened here was your fault. No matter what, you have to promise me that you'll stay determined. That you'll keep being you, despite anything you go through. I know it's hard to believe, but there is a whole world out there to see. It's full of good people and good things. You'll see. Stay determined Frisk, and I know you'll get to see it."

Frisk's smile grew bigger and they blinked. In a flash, the young girl's eyes had changed from a warm brown to shinning red.

Yeah Frisk, you'll keep that promise, right?

Frisk found themselves suddenly awake, the over hang from the fort just barely blocking the mid morning sunshine from their eyes. They stared at the make shift ceiling for several long seconds, trying their best to catch their quicken breath. Once they were sure that they were not going to be sick, like the last time they had dreamed, they slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep from their eyes.

Pulling themselves out from under the fort, Frisk scanned the living room, surprised to find it much cleaner than it had been when they had drifted off to sleep the previous night. Gone was the half empty bag of popcorn and chip bag. Part of the fort had been broken down too, the blankets and pillows returned to their rightful places. It was at that moment that Frisk heard a loud CLANG as something was dropped in the kitchen.

"Oh my god Sans, look what you did, you'll wake up the human!"

"Nah bro, I think you meant to say is look what you did."

"No, I clearly told you to hold tightly onto that bowl while I got out the other ingredients."

"Ehhh, let's chalk it up to user error."

Following the sounds banter, Frisk peeked into the small kitchen to find two skeletons attempting to round up what appeared to be pancake ingredients.

Papyrus, from the corner of his eye sockets, caught a glimpse of Frisk.

"Sans! See, I told you, you woke them up!" Papyrus yelled, gesturing wildly to where Frisk stood.

Sans turned to them, putting a hand up in greeting.

"Mornin' kid. Sorry if we woke you up."

Frisk shook their head.

"I was awake before the noise. What are you guys trying to do?"

"Well, human, we were attempting to prepare pancakes before you had awoken. But, seeing as you are now awake...perhaps you can help us find the ingredients to make the aforementioned food item?"

Frisk smiled and set out to help their friend's, doing their best to forget their dream for the time being.

\------------------------------

Sans deftly stepped away from the kitchen just as Frisk was showing Papyrus how to flip a pancake, the human only made tall enough to see the stove with the help on one of the kitchen chairs.

He stepped out the front door and took a seat on the upper most step, taking his phone out as he did. He punched in Alphys' number and hoped that she was already up.

The phone rang several times before there was a gentle click from the other end.

"H-hello? Sans? W-what are you doing c-calling this early?"

"Alphys, it's like, 10am."

"...w-well, to be fair, I w-was marathoning a new a-anime last night, s-so this i-is early for me!"

"Can't judge you for that Alphys. But, so, I'm calling to ask a favor."

"F-favor...like what?"

"Oh, you know, nothing big, just, uh...can I have a copy of your lab notes? Like, all of them?"

"...what in the w-world do you need those awful things for?"

"Welllll, kind of hard to explain..."

"S-Sans, I don't f-feel comfortable having another copy of that r-research lying around."

Sans was quiet for a moment.

"...Frisk hasn't been feeling too hot lately, Alphys. I was hoping that looking through your research and my own...maybe I can find a way to help them."

Sans could pretty much hear her mulling over what he said.

"I-I don't know w-why you think they'd h-help Sans. B-but if it's to help Frisk, I c-can make you a copy."

"Thanks Alphys...why don't you stop over at Toriel's today with it? Pap and I will probably be hanging out here for most of the day if that's ok with you?"

"I-I-I guess? I mean, uh, Undyne was maybe gonna c-come over and, uh-"

"Bring her too. Frisk would probably be really happy to see you guys."

"O-ok, yeah, I-I guess we h-haven't seen Frisk in a w-while...it'd be nice."

"See you in a few then."

Before Alphys could second guess his decision, Sans disconnected the call. Just as he was doing so, Toriel's tall shadow loomed over him.

"Hey, Tori, uh, I my or may not have invited Alphys and Undyne over to visit Frisk later today. Uh, hope that's ok?" Sans said, shrugging ever so slightly.

"Oh, no that's completely fine. I may have to stop out again to get enough food for dinner for everyone." She said, her smile not quite meeting her eyes.

Sans stood back up.

"You ok?"

She adverted her eyes, hands wringing together nervously.

"I just had a very rough conversation with the man who is working on Frisk's case. I am fine, I promise Sans."

She gently pushed past him and opened the door, leaving Sans alone on the stoop.


	4. Notes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frisk has a nice day with their friends.

Alphys scratched at her stomach as she lounged in her desk chair, opening document after document on her computer. With each one she opened, she sent it immediately to her small printer, the machine loudly churning out page after page.

As she sent the last document, she stood up and walked to where the printer was perched, waiting for it to finish. She rubbed at her eyes, the corners red and still crusted with sleep.

She looked at the cartoon themed clock on her wall, a gift from Papyrus. He had told her he had found it at a thrift store and that he knew how much she liked cartoons. She had been too touched by his generosity to correct him about the fact that she liked a specific type of cartoon, not all of them. The clock read 11:23am and she sighed at the sight. She had only gotten into bed around 6am and was still plenty tired.

Once all the documents had printed, she shuffled them all into a semi-neat pile, cramming them into a folder that was just able to contain the giant pile of notes.

Finishing what she had been woken up to do in the first place, she flopped onto the futon that she slept in, all but crawling back under the blankets.

Just as she had gotten comfortable, there was a knock on the front door. She groaned in frustration, dramatically flipped the blankets off of herself, and got herself up again. She muttered under her breath as she opened the door to her bedroom and made her way down the hall. She just really wanted to get some sleep before Undyne came over.

Her demeanor changed completely as soon as she opened the door.

"U-Undyne! O-oh, I thought you'd b-be over, um...later." she said, internally cringing. She hadn't had a chance to clean up in a few days and she knew her apartment showed it.

"Well, yeah, that was the plan! But I figured I'd surprise you with some breakfast food so, here I am!" Undyne said, all smiles as she held up a paper bag.

Alphys recognized the logo on the bag from a cafe she and Undyne had passed by when they were out and about together. She knew she had mentioned wanting to stop in there sometime, but that had been a while ago and she herself had nearly forgotten about it.

Her heart warmed at how thoughtful Undyne was.

"W-well, come on i-in! Just, uh...don't mind the mess."

Alphys led Undyne into the living room, her face reddening in embarrassment. Her anime binge the night before had left the couch and TV area in shambles, empty cans of soda, crumbs and a half finished bowl of instant noodles littered the ground and coffee table.

Undyne seemed to take no notice of the mess, took a seat on the couch and opened the bag, producing a delicious looking assortment of pastries.

"I didn't know what you would like best so I, uh, got a little of everything!" Undyne said, still all smiles.

"T-thanks Undyne, this looks really good!"

Alphys took a seat next to Undyne, stifling a yawn as she grabbed an apple strudel.

"Did you stay up late again?"

"Y-yeah, I was, um, w-watching an a-anime and it was just so good before I knew it the um...sun was rising? Ha ha ha?" Alphys answered, grinning awkwardly.

Undyne roared with laughter.

"You're a goof, but I like that about you!"

Alphys smiled to herself at the compliment.

"Well, t-that's me! G-Goofy to the c-core."

Undyne roared with laughter again, throwing her arm over Alphys' shoulder.

"Well, goof, tell me what's the plan for today? You wanna go on a walk? We can check out that bookstore you were telling me about!"

Alphys grew quiet for a moment and she munched on her pastry.

"W-well, um, about that. I-If it's ok with you, I need to stop over at T-Toriel's home sometime today."

"Why? Did she call you about something?"

"N-no it was, um, Sans w-who asked me t-to stop by. He's there t-today and-"

"Ohhhhhhhhhh!" Undyne all but screamed in glee, making Alphys jump.

"Sans is at Tori's? Did they start, uh, you know?" at this Undyne made a comical kissy face.

Alphys covered her mouth, trying to stop herself from snorting in laughter.

"N-no, well, at least I'm p-pretty sure not? He, uh, a-asked me to bring him a copy of m-my notes. F-from when I was, uh, the Royal Scientist. So...um. Yeah!"

Undyne's goofy face fell ever so slightly at those words.

"What? Really? Did he say what he needed them for?"

"He, uh, he just said that i-it was to help Frisk? A-apparently they're not f-feeling super well? N-not really sure how those will help but he was pretty a-adamant that I b-bring him a copy!"

At those words, Undyne stood up so fiercely that she nearly knocked the coffee table over.

"What?! They're not feeling good!? Well, what are we doing waiting here? Alphys, we have to go over there right now!" Undyne all but shoved the breakfast food back into the bag and grabbed Alphys' hand, pulling her to the door.

"U-Undyne, wait!" Alphys said, trying with all her might to pull against Undyne's unyielding grasp.

"Yeah?"

"U-Undyne, we can't go over there yet!"

"Why not!?"

Alphys simply gestured to herself. She was still in her pajamas.

"Oh. Yeah! You should probably change!" Undyne said, letting go of her hand.

"I-I'll be quick, I-I promise." She scuttled back to her room, accidentally slamming the door close.

She quickly changed into one of the few dresses she owned, doing her best to smooth out the wrinkles.

"Well, it's cute and it's clean. That's really all that matters I guess." she muttered to herself, gathering up the file full of notes before leaving her room once more.

"That's a cute dress!" Undyne said, this time offering her hand to Alphys.

"Y-you think?"

"Well, yeah! It, uh, looks really good on you!"

"T-thanks. And, um, t-thanks for breakfast too. T-that was really thoughtful of you. I-It was a nice surprise."

Alphys did not miss the small blush forming on Undyne's face as she smiled. She took the offered hand and they soon found themselves walking to Toriel's home, hand in hand.

\-----------------------------------------

Papyrus was doing his best to try and remember where the last of the pillows and blankets had originally come from. He hadn't realized how many they had used in making their fort the night before and was now at a loss as to where everything had originally been.

"Frisk, where did this big red blanket come from again?"

Frisk turned from where they were helping gather up the last of the breakfast dishes in the dinning room. Their pancakes had come out surprisingly well. True, Toriel had been kind enough to offer a hand when it came to actually flipping them, but the batter was the result of their work alone.

"Um, I think that one came from the hall closet upstairs Papyrus."

"Oh right! Thank you Frisk!"

Papyrus took the stairs two at a time, arms filled with the red blanket in question. The upstairs of the townhouse was laid out in such a way that the bathroom fell right at the top of the stairs. Papyrus stood in the landing by the bathroom, peeking down the upstairs hallway where three doors lay. The first had the word "Firsk" in foam lettering across the top of it, the door furthest down the hall had a small "Snail X-ing" sign hanging on it at eye level.

Papyrus, with his terrific deduction skills, figured that the linen closet could only be behind the door that lay in the middle. A few quick strides later and he found himself in front of the closet, opening it and putting the blanket back where it belonged. He closed the closet door and was just about to make his way back downstairs when he heard Toriel's voice drifting from her bedroom.

"-was calling in the hopes that I could set up an appointment. Their name is Frisk. My relations to the child? I am in the process of adopting them. Unfortunately no, I do not know their age...I do not appreciate that tone ma'am, they do not have a birth certificate, their birth date is unknown. Yes, I was referred to this office. Liam Holstein. Yes, in the Child and Family Services Department. Yes, I can hold."

It was not as if he was trying to listen in to Toriel's phone call, but her partially opened door did not do much to muffle her voice. Papyrus, being the good Monster that he was, did not want to further eavesdrop on what sounded like a personal conversation. Doing his best to be quiet, he retraced his steps back down the hall and stairs.

In the living room once more, Papyrus was met with he sight of Frisk putting the last of the pillows back into place, fluffing it with flourish.

"Well done human, the living area is now officially cleaned!" He said, extending a hand for a high five.

Frisk smiled widely, smacking their own hand against Papyrus'. At that moment, there was a knock at the door.

"Oh, I wonder who that is?" Papyrus asked, turning his attention to the door.

He opened the door and was immediately met with a fist. At the last moment he blocked it, his eyes bulging in surprise. He pushed the fist away from his face, not surprised to see who it belonged to.

"Hi Undyne."

"Good block Papyrus!" She said, grinning from ear to ear.

Papyrus stepped aside to let Undyne and Alphys in.

"Hey kid!" Undyne ruffled their hair, leaving it considerably mussed up.

"H-hi Frisk." Alphys gently flattened their hair back into place.

Frisk smiled and waved as both of them entered the house.

"Is that Undyne and Alphys?" Sans' yelled from the kitchen.

"Sans, don't yell while you're inside, it's rude. Come say hi!" Papyrus screamed, making Frisk giggle ever so slightly.

Sans eventually made his way into the living room, his outfit sending everyone into a fit of giggles.

He was wearing a full length, frilly apron, bright yellow rubber gloves, and was drying a plate with a hand towel decorated with cartoon snails.

"What?" He asked, his question only making the giggling worse.

"Y-your outfit i-it's, um..." Alphys couldn't help herself as she snorted in laughter.

"Hey, laugh all you want. This skeleton isn't about to get his hands covered in grease."

With that snark comment, Sans made his way back to the kitchen to finish the dishes, leaving the others to turn their giggling into howling laughter.

"Oh my, it sounds like there is a party going on down here!"

Toriel made her way down the stairs, pocketing her phone as she did.

"Tori! Here, brought some snacks." Undyne said, offering the bag of pastries to her.

"Oh, wow, thank you very much Undyne!" Tori said, taking the bag.

"Yeah, uh, bought some for breakfast and had a lot left over."

"Well, either way, thank you for bringing them."

Toriel made her way into the dinning room, unloading the bag onto the table, Undyne and Papyrus following her to help where they could.

Alphys still stood by the door with Frisk, wringing her hands together nervously

Frisk gently tugged at the back of Alphys' dress.

"Y-yes Frisk?"

"My mom got me a racing game last week. You wanna play with me?"

"Well, y-yeah!"

Frisk smiled and pulled her to the TV, giving her a second to set the folder she was holding down on the TV consol. They were quick to get the game set up and were soon joined by Undyne, Toriel, Papyrus, and Sans

The afternoon continued on in that manner, everyone taking turns playing the racing games with Frisk. Toriel was surprisingly good for a first time player, much to the chagrin of a seasoned player like Alphys.

It was only when Frisk was falling asleep while sitting up that Toriel suggested that they head out to let Frisk rest.

They all gathered up their things and said their good-byes, Frisk sleepily waving at them from where Tori held them to her chest.

They walked down the street together in a comfortable silence for several minutes.

"So, Sans...what's up with Frisk?" Undyne asked as they turned a corner, the late afternoon light streaming down the street.

Sans' footsteps did not falter at the question. He merely shrugged.

"Eh...seems the kid just hasn't been feeling super good lately, you know?"

"Yeah, well, I kind of noticed that already."

"Well, then you know just about as much as I do."

Undyne stopped in her tracks, hands clenching and unclenching into fists.

"You asked Alphys to bring you a copy of her notes today. To help Frisk."

Sans stopped too, his hand tightening its grip on the folder of notes, his other burying itself deeper into the pocket of his hoodie.

He spun on his heels to face Undyne, giving her a prolonged wink like he was known to do on occasion.

"Never hurts to cover all your bases when someone hasn't been feeling good for a few days."

"Sans, the kid looked like a freaking zombie. You don't look like they do just from "not feeling good" for a day or two." Undyne said, making quotation marks with her fingers.

Sans shrugged again and turned away from the other Monster once more.

"Sans, if you know something, you have to tell us!" Undyne's voice had gotten loud enough that it warranted the attention of several passers by.

"U-Undyne..." Alphys said quietly, not at all a fan of the additional attention.

Undyne was quick to notice the nervousness in Alphys' voice. She took a deep breath, doing her best to quell her annoyance.

"Sans, come on man. We're Frisk's friends too. You have to tell us what's going on with them."

Sans was quiet for moment, as if pondering what she had said.

"Eh...Don't you know me, Undyne? I'm as lazy as they come. I don't do anything unless I really have to." he said with finality, walking away from the others.

"Sans, wait, what the hell are you tal-" Undyne stopped, but only because Papyrus had placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Undyne, please..." Papyrus said.

She was quiet as she stared at Sans' retreating back.

"Papyrus, talk some sense into him, will you? We're all Frisk's friends, right? If he knows what's going on with them, he should tell us!" She said this through clenched teeth, doing her best to keep what cool she had left.

Papyrus removed his hand from Undyne's shoulder.

"I know Undyne. He really should but...but I get the feeling that Sans himself hasn't been feeling super good lately either."

She turned her head so quickly towards Papyrus that he found himself jumping ever so slightly in surprise.

"That's a load of crap and you know it Papyrus!"

"No, Undyne, I'm serious! I'm..." Papyrus lowered his voice to a whisper at this point, "I'm actually really worried! Since we came to the surface, he's been acting differently."

Undyne's hard expression softened at the concern in Papyrus' voice.

"Differently how?"

Papyrus tapped his fingertips together, a behavior Undyne knew he only did when very worrired.

"He...he seems sad, but not sad? Oh, it's hard to explain Undyne. I've seen him sad or upset before but this somehow feels different. He makes his jokes and puns and he's just as goofy as ever but...it feels like he's just going through the motions and doesn't actually enjoy any of what he's doing. I can't put my finger on why it seems like that, but he just-"

"Papyrus, c'mon!" Sans yelled. He had made it quite a distance before realizing that his brother was not in tow.

Papyrus turned his attention to where Sans was, his brother gesturing for him to hurry up.

"I've got to go. Undyne, Alphys, it was very nice to see you. I'll text you when we get home!"

Undyne grabbed Papyrus' elbow for a moment, squeezing it gently.

"Let me know if you need help Papyrus, ok?"

Papyrus gave her a warm smile and two thumbs up before sprinting after his brother, his long legs carrying him in only a few strides to Sans' side. A few moments later, Sans and Papyrus crossed the road and were out of sight.

"T-that was...something." Alphys said quietly.

Undyne sighed.

"Yeah, that was."

They both stood there for several loong seconds before Undyne clenched her fists again and pumped her arms up wildly.

"Alright!" Undyne bellowed, her voice echoing.

Alphys jumped slightly at the noise. Undyne turned her attention to the smaller Monster, all smiles once more.

"Alphys!"

""U-Undyne?"

"Regardless of what Sans does or doesn't know, regardless of what he'll say or won't say, we should visit Frisk again soon! That should help them feel better, right?"

Alphys smiled.

"Y-yeah. I mean, t-they seemed very t-tired today, but I'm pretty s-sure they were still happy to have everyone o-over."

"Yeah! They did look happy to see everyone!"

Undyne began walking at this point again.

"Next time we go over, let's bring them some other games to play! Weren't you telling me about a party game that comes on one of those game systems? We should bring them one of those!"

"T-that's a really good idea Undyne! I'm sure t-they'd love that!"

"Yeah! You're right! I bet they would!"

They walked on, doing their best to come up with their own ways to help Frisk with whatever it was that made them look so tired and down.

\-----------------------

Hours after leaving Toriel's, Sans sat on the couch in the living room of his and Papyrus' apartment, perusing the notes that Alphys had given him, every now and then making a notation as he went. He rubbed at the corner of his eye sockets, tiredness creeping into his bones as it always did just when he was trying to be productive.

"Sans!"

Sans jumped slightly at the sound of Papyrus' voice. His brother stood in the doorway to the kitchen, his outfit recently changed into a set of adult sized footie pajamas that he'd found online.

"What's up bro?" he asked, mentally preparing himself. He was sure Papyrus was going to try and ask him what had happened earlier that day with Undyne.

"Are you going to stay down here with your notes all night? I really wanted to watch some TV, but I don't want to disturb you." Papyrus said, a bowl of popcorn in hand.

Sans was silent for a moment as relief washed over him. So glad was he that Papyrus did not want to chat about what he had said earlier, he gathered the notes up from his lap and piled them on the coffee table in front of the couch.

"I think I'll call it a night with this. I'll watch some TV with you instead Pap."

"Ho boy, even better!" Papyrus flipped off the last light that remained on in the room as he flipped the TV on, plopping himself on the other corner of the couch.

"Just you wait Sans, I found the most wonderful channel the other night!" Papyrus began flipping through the channels rapidly, only stopping once he had landed on an infomercial.

"Oh, here it is Sans! Now, from what I have deduced, this is some sort of program that humans run to show the worst products that they can come up with! Oh, I saw this one the other night! Sans, this fat human talks about this really expensive blender for forty-five minutes. Forty-five whole minutes Sans!"

Sans smiled as his brother continued to banter on about the infomercials he had already seen, rubbing at his eye sockets again.

He was a lot more tired than he had originally thought...

Sans found himself at the end of a long, sunlit hallway, staring down at a small, nondescript figure that drew closer and closer to him. He eventually recognized it as a small human, hair cut to shoulder length, a rusty knife in their hand.

At the sight of the human, he could feel a warm tingling in his fingertips that spread to his hands that spread to his arms that spread to his shoulders and crept up the back of his neck. It made him shake ever so slightly, made his foot tap on the ground impatiently.

The human stopped only a few feet from him, their eyes covered by their bangs.

He knew this wasn't the first time they had walked down the hallway. Far from it.

He closed his eyes.

"Let's just get to the point."

His eyes flew open and-

Sans found himself at the sentry stand in Hotland, smiling as he carefully balanced a 'dog on a small human's head. This was the fifth that they had asked for.

"Here. Have fun."

They asked for another.

"Here. Have fun."

They asked for another.

"Here. Have f-"

Sans found himself staring at the dust covered ground of Snowdin, his brother's scarf caught on a nearby snowbank. The ache in his chest was familiar, but it was still an awful weight to carr-

Sans found himself smiling as Papyrus was excitedly stamping in the snow.

"Oh my god Sans, is that a human?!" Papyrus asked, trying his best to speak in a whisper.

"Uh, I think that's a roc-"

Sans found himself staring at a deep cut in his chest, terror and shock coursing through his bod-

Sans felt a warmth in his chest as he listened to the Monster on the other side of the door lau-

Sans found himself pouring over pages of notes and blueprints, trying to figure ou-

Sans found himself happily chatting with Grillby over a plate of fri-

Sans found himself just barely dodging a rusty kni-

Sans found himself smiling at-

Sans found himself cryi-

Sans found himse-

Sans foun-

Sans found himself being shaken awake, the room glowing in a violent blue light that came from his own eye, his chest heaving and hands trembling.

"Sans! Oh thank god, you weren't waking up and you were screaming and, oh my god, are you alright?"

It took Sans several long seconds to realize who it was that he was looking at.

"P-Papyrus?" He whispered, the blue light extinguishing immediately, leaving them bathed in the light of the TV.

"Sans, are you alright?"

He slowly sat up, gently pushing his brother's hands away.

"Y-yeah I'm fine. Just a, uh...just a bad dream. I'm fine Pap."

He stood up with every intention to head straight to his room. He was stopped by hand on his shoulder.

"Sans, really, are you ok?"

"I said I was, right? I'm fine, I promise."

"...Sans, I know how much you hate making promises."

Sans shrugged his brother's hand off, clenching his fists as he did so.

"Sans, I'm not stupid. I know that something is bothering you."

He sighed deeply and turned back to his brother.

"I never said you were stupid Papyrus."

"You just treat me like I am."

The curt tone in Papyrus' voice threw Sans for a loop.

"Papyrus...please. You know that's never what I meant to do."

"Then why won't you tell me what's bothering you?"

Sans did his best not to meet Papyrus' intense stare.

"Sans, please just tell me wh-"

"Papyrus!" Sans yelled, a lump forming in his throat as his brother jumped in suspire.

"I...I can't. I don't know...I don't know how to tell you what's wrong. I don't know how to tell anyone what's wrong. I...I..." Sans said, voice shaking.

"Sans..." Papyrus stepped closer to his brother, pulling him into a loose hug.

Sans stiffened at the embrace.

"I know you think that being my older brother means that you always have to look out for me. I know you have a hard time talking about anything that isn't, ugh, pun related. But, you know, you don't have to be strong all the time! Not for me, not for anyone. You need to talk to someone. Right now, you...it looked like whatever it was that you were dreaming about really hurt you! Whatever is troubling you, it must be weighing heavily on your mind. Please, Sans, let me be a good brother. You've helped me out for so long with so many different thing. Now, give me the chance to help you! Please..."

The lump had migrated from Sans' throat to his chest, making it hard for him to breathe. His breathing rattled once more, now because he was doing his best to hold back tears.

All he found himself capable of doing was to return Papyrus' hug, tightly pulling himself closer to his brother's chest.

They stood like that for a long time, Sans' whole body shaking from the weight of his dream that felt so real that it might as well have been a mess of memories. While he was able to stave off any tears from actually falling, it took an extraordinarily long time for the lump in his chest to dissipate.

Once the lump had finally managed to untangle itself, he loosened his grip and pulled himself from his brother's hug, still pointedly avoiding Papyrus' gaze.

Papyrus remained silent, something that Sans was thankful for.

"Papyrus..." Sans said in a whisper.

"Yes Sans?" Sans could feel Papyrus straighten himself up, completely attentive to what he was about to say.

"Did you...did you ever wonder how Frisk managed to do everything that they did? Did you ever wonder why they never died while they were in the Underground?"


	5. Breakfast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus and Undyne try to figure out how they can help Frisk.

Papyrus walked along the running path that he had become familiar with after daily use, waving at passing joggers that had come to recognize him. While he was more often than not fond of jogging right along with them, this morning called for a more calm pace, something that allowed him to enjoy the fresh morning air, that gave him the time to think.

It had been two days since he and Sans had stayed up until the wee hours of the morning talking together, his brother doing his best to explain what his dream had consisted of and what it was that Frisk was currently dealing with.

It had gotten to the point where Sans even had to pull out Alphys' notes to better explain what Determination was, to give him a better idea of what it was that had given Frisk, little human child Frisk, the ability to bring themselves back from the dead over and over again.

Papyrus had done his best to understand the more sciencey aspects of the conversation but, truth be told, some of it had still gone over his head, despite Sans' careful explanations and patience. Regardless of what parts of the conversation that had confused him, there was one thing he was certain of: Frisk was having nightmares that were progressively getting worse and Sans was trying to figure out a way to help them out.

He yawned as he walked, his body still trying to recover from that late night conversation.

"Papyrus!"

In his still tired state there was no way for him to prepare himself for the pair of strong arms that wrapped around his torsos and, in one swift, fluid motion, suplexed him.

"H-Hi Undyne." He said from where he lay crumpled on the ground, head spinning ever so slightly.

"Wow Papyrus, you still waking up? I haven't been able to surprise you like that in a long time!"

She offered him her hand and helped him to his feet, patting at his back as she did so.

"You're not hurt right?"

"No, I'm fine Undyne. Just wasn't really paying attention." Papyrus said, brushing at a spot of dirt he noticed on his running shorts and shirt.

Had he been watching Undyne, he would have seen a look of concern pass over her face. She knew it wasn't like Papyrus to just not pay attention to his surroundings. For all of his naivety, he was a very attentive Monster in regards to everything he did and to everything around him. She knew him well enough to recognize when something was weighing heavily on his mind.

"Hey, wanna go get something to eat? My treat!" She asked him, a toothy grin in place.

He snapped his attention back to her.

"Undyne, I'm really ok, I promise!"

"Hey, don't get the wrong idea here! I was gonna get something anyways after my run."

"Well, ok. But I can pay for-"

Her expression grew intense.

"I still owe you for that pizza from two weeks ago. I insist that I pay you back with an after exercise breakfast! Is there a good place to eat around here?"

Papyrus knew better than to argue with her further.

"Yeah, uh, there's a dinner right across the street." Papyrus pointed to a restaurant caddy corner to where they were standing.

"Well, let's get going!" Undyne said, face relaxing back into a less frightening look.

They crossed the street without issue. Upon entering the diner, they were met with the squeals of delight as a waitress came out from behind the counter, giving Papyrus a great big hug.

"Oh my gosh, Papyrus! Where have you been? I haven't seen you in almost a week!"

The girl was easily still in her early teens, her sweet face speckled with the trademark pock marks that often went hand and hand with puberty.

"I know, I'm very sorry for not coming sooner" He returned her hug before turning to Undyne. "Undyne, this is Miss Bes. She tells me I'm one of her regulars here!"

"Nice to meet you." she said, extending her hand.

Bes shook it enthusiastically, smiling from ear to ear.

"No, it's nice to meet you! Papyrus has told all of us here so much about you Miss Undyne. Please, follow me, I'll sit you at the counter."

Bes let go of Undyne's hand and led them to the diner's long counter, setting a menu down in front of only one of the seats.

"I know what Papyrus wants, but I imagine you don't know what you'd like yet, right?" Bes' question was directed at Undyne.

"Ah, well, do you guys make pancakes here?"

"Sure do!"

"Can I have two of those?"

"Yes Ma'am!" Bes pulled the menu from where she had just set it, tucking it back under the counter from where it had come, heading to the cookline to put in their order.

"Papyrus, why do they know you so well here?" Undyne asked, knowing there had to be a story behind the younger teenager's reaction to seeing him.

"Truth be told, it's probably because I do come here pretty often. But the very first time I visited was pretty memorable too, so that might be why?"

"Memorable how?" Undyne wiggled her eyebrows at him, encouraging him to continue with his story.

"Well...the first time I came here was during the first week of all us Monsters being on the surface. It was a little later in the evening and I was out and about and was very hungry. I came across this place and stopped in for a bite to eat. Miss Bes, though I didn't know her name at the time, was getting yelled at by this very, uh, screamy human man about getting some very small thing wrong with his order. Undyne, I went right up to him, because really there's no good reason to yell at people like he was yelling at Miss Bes, and asked him to stop. I don't think he'd ever seen a Monster like me before because, well, I'm pretty sure he got scared enough to make a mess in his pants. If I recall correctly, he threw some money on his table to pay for what he had gotten and just sort of left! Which was probably for the better because he, ah, he really stank."

Undyne had the bite her lower lip to keep herself from erupting in laughter, shoulders shaking from the effort.

"So wait, Papyrus, you mean to tell me that the first time you came in here, you literally scared the shit out of someone?"

With a shrug, Papyrus answered her question with a simple,

"I guess?"

Undyne's shoulder's shook harder and the corners or her eyes pricked with tears as she continued to restrain herself. She knew how loud her laughter could be and she had no desire to hurt anyone's hearing that morning.

"O-oh my god Papyrus, that's too funny." She said once she wasn't on the brink of roaring laughter anymore.

He gave her a wide grin, in response. It was at that moment that their food arrived. Undyne's pancakes filled the plate from edge to edge and were generously topped with butter and syrup. Papyrus was given what looked like a cheese and chili covered plate of spaghetti.

"Thank you Miss Bes, please give our compliments to the chef!"

"Eduardo already knows how much you like his food Papyrus, but I'll tell him again!"

From there they dug into their meals heartily. After serval minutes of silence, all spent happily indulging in their food, Undyne turned her attention back to Papyrus.

"I take it you got a chance to talk to Sans?"

Papyrus stopped mid bite, his fork clamped in between his teeth. He finished the bite and set his fork to the side of his plate.

"Was it that obvious?"

She shrugged.

"Not until I thought about it for a bit. I haven't managed to suplex you in over a year...I just connected the dots from there Pap."

Papyrus grew quiet, moving his food around the plate with his fork.

"Did he tell you what's been going on with Frisk?"

Papyrus continued to fiddle with his food for a long moment.

"Yes...mostly? I know he was honest with me, but a lot of what he said was way over my head. He was talking about Determination and resets and soul power and Frisk being able to come back from the dead...I really did my best to make sense out of it all, but some of it was just so beyond me Undyne. I know you want to know what's wrong with Frisk, but I don't know how to tell you all the details and I'm so sorr-"

"Hey, it's ok." Undyne interrupted his increasingly anxious banter, her hand gently grabbing at his shoulder.

Papyrus' buzzing thoughts instantly calmed. He managed a deep breath as Bes came back over to them.

"How's everything tasting?"

"Very good, thanks!" Undyne answered for them, her hand moving from Papyru's shoulder to pick her fork up once more.

Bes shot both of them a warm smile and wandered off to the other customers at the counter, refilling coffees and clearing empty plates.

"I didn't ask my question to make things hard on you, Papyrus. I just...Frisk is such a good kid. If it weren't for them, we'd probably all still be trapped in the Underground. If there's anyway to help them, I want to know what I can do, you know?"

"I know Undyne. It's just...I'm not sure if there's much that any of us can do. At the end of the day, what Sans' explained to me boils down to an issue that does not have a very clear solution. Frisk seems to be having increasingly bad nightmares about...well, about the time they spent in the Underground."

Undyne put another bite of pancake into her mouth. She was quiet for a very long moment as she chewed and then swallowed her food.

"Hm, well, that explains why they looked so tired the other day."

Papyrus nodded in agreement, putting another bite of spaghetti into his mouth. They ate in silence again for a few minutes, their plates empty by the time Papyrus opened his mouth to talk again.

"Undyne, I know you want to help and I want to help them too. But what can we do? It's not something we can protect them from or something that we can chase away for them. They've done so much for everyone around them, but how can we protect them from something only they can see?"

"Yeah...I hear ya Papyrus."

They sat in silence once more for a long time, both lost in thought. That was, until Undyne snapped her fingers loudly, the action demanding Papyrus' attention once more.

"We gotta make them a care package."

"A what?"

"A care package Papyrus! Except, we don't have to actually ship it or anything, we can just give it to them...also let's call it a Dream Care Package instead because that sounds way better."

"What would we put into it?"

"Anything to help them sleep better, duh!" Her enthusiasm was contagious.

"Oh, oh! Undyne, could we get them one of those extra fuzzy blankets from the mall?"

"Totally! What about those sleep masks that you can warm up in the microwave?"

"Can we make sure it's an aromatherapy one?!"

Undyne's smile widened

"Even better!"

They continued on with their brainstorming, Papyrus at some point asking Bes for a pen and paper so they wouldn't forget any of their ideas. While they both knew that there was no way their gifts could actually make Frisk's nightmares stop, they knew it would help their spirit.

Besides, they weren't the type to just sit back and do nothing while a friend was in need.

\----------------------------

Sans sat on his bed, notes surrounding him, completely frustrated at this point. 

If his theory was correct, Frisk was dealing with some sort of echo effect as time tried to repair itself from all the resets and backpedaling Frisk had done while in the Underground. In short, he figured the reason the dreams felt like memories was that they were. Maybe not for his Frisk, but for some Frisk, somewhere, at some time, those dreams were truly their memories.

The solution to problem was at the same time simple and complicated: Frisk just had to last long enough for the timelines to correct themselves and stop echoing memories into their dreams. But really, how do you tell anyone, let alone a kid "Tough luck about those awful nightmares, the only solution is to just wait it out until they stop!"

Though reality itself hadn't fallen apart or just stopped completely, which to Sans' was a pretty good sign in and of itself, there was no way for him to know how long these dreams would plague Frisk or even how bad they would get. There were too many variables that he couldn't calculate for, too many things he may not even realize were pertinent.

Long and the short of it, he was now stumped.

Sans rubbed at his head in an annoyed fashion and pushed his notes to the side, climbing off of his bed. He exited his room, irritation running through every bone in his body.

He knew there had to be solution that could work for Frisk. He also knew that he was probably too close to the problem itself to clearly see it at this point in the research. So, in doing what any good, annoyed Monster researcher would do when at a lose for how to fix something, he walked to the shared computer in the kitchen, sat down on the stool, and simply typed "how do I stop bad dreams???" into the search engine once it had loaded.

The second link the search found for him was simply titled "Lucid Dreaming: Say Buh-bye to Nightmares!". In clicking on the page, he managed to wade through some of the more fluffed up wording of the website, he's irritation slowly moving focus from his research to himself. Had he known a possible solution to Frisk's nightmares would have been made clear to him with a simple internet search, he would have stormed out of his room sooner.

Taking his phone out of his pocket, Sans' dialed Frisk's number, not entirely surprised that it went straight to voicemail. The kid had become well known for not charging their phone regularly, so it wasn't very alarming.

Ending the call, he punched in Tori's number quickly, and sent the call. The phone only range once before Tori picked up on the other end.

"Hello, this is Toriel!"

"Hey Tori."

"Oh, Sans is that you? How are you?!"

Sans grinned. Her enthusiasm was easy to read, even over the phone.

"I'm good Tori, thanks for asking. Hey, I was wondering if I could talk with Frisk?"

"Oh, did their phone go to voicemail again? I swear, that is the only thing that child is ever forgetful about." The last part she mumbled to herself, the sound of clanking dishes and running water acting as background noise.

"It did."

"Give me just a moment Sans." The noise of the water and Tori's proceeding cry of 'Frisk! My child, you have a phone call!' were muffled.

Several moments later Sans could hear Tori handing the phone over to someone else, a far away 'It's Sans dear' making its way through the receiver.

"Hi Sans!" he could piratically see Frisk's tired smile that was undoubtedly on their face.

"Hey kiddo, how you doing?"

There was a small pause.

"Ok...I guess?"

"Better than being bad, right?"

That warranted him a small giggle.

"Hey, kid, can you do me a favor?"

"Yeah?"

"Did Alphys get a chance to come over with that computer she was promising you?"

"Yeah, she stopped over yesterday! She even showed me and mom how to use the internet and even how to play games on it!"

"That was nice of her, yeah? Well, can you go to your computer for a second? I want you to look at something I found."

"Yeah, hang on."

Sans could hear them accidentally breath right into the receiver of the phone as they walked to their computer. He could hear the distant scrapping of what could only be a chair leg as it was pulled against the ground.

"OK, what now?"

"Type in 'lucid dreaming' into the search engine."

"How do I spell lucid?"

"L-U-C-I-D."

Sans listened to them slowly type out the word, each letter making a little tac tac noise as they typed.

"Ok, searched for it. Which one should I click on?"

"Second one down."

There was a long pause on the other end.

"This is a lot to read...what is this Sans?"

"Hey it's ok kid, have Tori read it with you when you guys get a chance. The idea is pretty straightforward: you tell yourself how your dreams are gonna go as you fall asleep."

"...what?" Sans could not mistake the doubt in their voice and couldn't help but chuckle.

"Yeah, I know, not exactly scientific sounding, but I think it's worth a try. You're a pretty determined kid anyways, you know? Just give it a try for me, ok?"

"Ok...hey, Sans?"

"Yeah kid?"

"Can you come over again soon?"

"Sure kid. How about tomorrow?"

"Please!"

"I'll see you then. Hey, Frisk?"

"Yeah Sans?"

"How are you holding up? For real I mean?"

There was a long bit of silence.

"I'm very tired Sans. I'm doing my best, but I'm just...I'm tired."

Sans felt his heart sink at their answer. Their voice sounded so weak and weary.

"I know you are kid. Just...try to stay determined for me, ok? I'm rootin' for you."

"I'll...I'll try."

"You'll do good kid. If you can free an entire race from captivity, a nightmare or two got nothing on you."

"Thanks Sans."

With no preamble Frisk hung up the phone, leaving Sans with a beeping dial tone.

\------------------------------------------

Laying down in bed much later that night, Frisk did as the instructions on the website had told them. Deep even breathing coupled with a mantra of their choice.

I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad.

I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad.

I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad.

They slowly slipped into a deep sleep, unaware that their mantra was far from what they would actually be able to do with their dream that night.


	6. The House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frisk is forced to remember things that they would have preferred forgotten forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Be advised that there are mentions of child abuse in this chapter. Tread with care if this subject is triggering to you.

The first thing Frisk becomes aware of is the fact that they are walking.

Their path is narrow and winding, a cold and oppressive chill surrounds them, making it hard to breat-

-I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad.-

The thought cuts through the fog of their dreams, reminding them of why they were there. In response, the world around them shifted.

They found themselves in the kitchen dinning room, coloring with Toriel and enjoying a piece of one of her pi-

"No." A voice rings out around them, the scene shifting once more, reverting back to the dark path.

They stare at their feet as they walk in the near darkness, one in front of the other, on and on and on and on and-

-I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad.-

Frisk found themselves playing video games with Alphys, her excitedly explaining the racing mechanics and the controls so they can pla-

"No!" the voice rings out once more.

The air was eerily still and quiet around them. Their feet make no noise against the ground. They can’t help but feel a sense of dread looming over them that is nearly pa-

I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad.

They are doing a word search puzzle with Papyrus, the skeleton wondering out loud how they were doing so well without even tryi-

"I said no!"

The scene around Frisk froze and stuttered for a moment before falling away completely, leaving them in a space so bare and empty that it was unnerving.

From far to their left Frisk watched as a child materialized, starting from their bare feet and working up to the crown of their head. Their hair was shoulder length, their expression unreadable, their eyes too bright, their long sleeved shirt stripped green and yellow.

"You don't get to choose here, not while I'm here Frisk." Their voice, while cheery in tone, had a certain iciness to it that sent an uncomfortable shiver down Frisk's spine.

"...who are you?"

"Me? Well...you could say that I'm a demon that comes when its name is called. I'm only here because you kept calling out for me."

The child's expression frightened Frisk.

"I haven't been calling out for anyone."

The child took a step towards them, their head tilting ever so slightly. Frisk tried to take a step back, but found their legs failing them, unable to move at all.

"But you have Frisk. You've been calling out my name ever since you left the Underground. You've been calling out my name, calling out for me to hurt you ever since then."

They took another step towards them. Frisk felt the beginnings of sweat beading on their forehead.

"I haven't! I don't even know who you are!"

The light in the child's eyes grew brighter for a moment and their smile grew more cruel.

"You do. You do Frisk, you're just very good at burying memories you don't want to see. You've always been so full of Determination, haven't you? It wouldn't be very hard for someone like you to push things away. It would be easy enough for you to be determined enough to forget something if the memory was bad enough, wouldn't you agree?"

Another step taken, more beading sweat, feet still frozen in place.

"You need to stop! T-this isn't your dream, it's mine! Get out!"

Frisk watched as the child flickered for a second, like the flame of a candle when caught in a sudden breeze.

"I already told you Frisk, I'm only here because you called me." The child said, voice distorted as their body solidified once more.

"You're lying, why would I want to see this? Why would I want to see any of these nightmares?"

The child's eyes narrowed slightly and their smile somehow found the space to grow wider.

"Because despite every good thing you've done, deep down you know you're rotten to the core. Even before you called out to me, you knew this. You just want me to remind you, right?"

Frisk couldn't help the shaking in their hands.

"W-what do you mean?"

The child took another step towards them.

"You've felt it ever since you came to the surface, right? Felt like you were forgetting something? Didn't you think it weird that you could remember where you lived before falling into the Underground, but seemed stumped on remembering what you actually did while living there?"

A cold and sick feeling had settled its way into Frisk's stomach. The feeling itself was not unnerving, it was the fact that it felt uncomfortably familiar that set Frisk further on edge.

"Haven't you wondered what memories you might be hiding from yourself? Don't you think we should let them breathe for a while? Maybe you'll remember my name. Maybe you'll remember the look on Asriel's face when you left them all alone. Maybe you'll remember what happened in that house you lived in for so long. What do you say Frisk, why don't we crack open that skull of yours?"

Frisk trembled as they clamped their hands over their ears and clenched their eyes completely shut, muttering under their breath.

"I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad. I am in control of my dreams, I will see nothing bad. I am in contro-"

"I already told you to stop Frisk."

Frisk's eyes were forced open and they found themselves face to face with the child, their smile up close strained and terrifying, their eyes almost bulging.

"Let's see just how dark the corners of your mind are, ok?" Their voice was as sweet as honey, but cut through Frisk like a knife.

Their vision swam for a long moment, their mind went fuzzy, the ringing in their ears drowned out their thoughts. They closed their eyes, trying their best to stop the sudden rise of nausea. When they opened their eyes again, a sick, cold terror filled them as the room around them became all too familiar.

The room was large but mostly bare, a luxurious looking arm chair in the corner closest to the door the only other piece of furniture in the room apart from the bed, the closet on the wall opposite from the bed shut tight.

They sat in the dark as they did on most nights, waiting endlessly.

There was only ever one person who came to visit them at night in this room. He was tall, very pale skinned and always smelled of like harsh soap and smoke. He came every third or fourth night and would stay with them for hours. For the two years or so that they could remember being in this room, he would bring them treats and presents and would only occasionally say things that made them uncomfortable. Or he would let his hand linger on their back for longer than Frisk liked. Or he would take a nap with them and pull them too close to his chest. Or he would bury his face in their hair for minutes at a time and just...breathe loudly.

As of late, the gifts had ceased entirely and the man's weird antics had become much worse. He kept making them take their clothes off while he was there. Kept making them sit in his lap while he was naked. Kept touching their thighs, their necks, their stomach, even when Frisk asked him not to. He had only just the other night made Frisk touch his body too, even though they had cried and pleaded and said they didn't want to over and over and over-

Frisk buried their head in their hands, pushing the memories and accompanying feeling to the back of their mind, though they still felt nauseated and gross for several long minutes after.

The chill of terror ran through them as the handle on their door squeaked quietly as it began to turn.

The man wasn't suppose to be back. He was never back this early. Why was he here? What would he make them do? Oh no, no no no no no no-

Their panicked thoughts stopped suddenly at the sight of who it was entering their room.

"Mila?"

The girl, only fourteen years old but still the oldest child in the house, silently put a finger to her mouth as she softly closed the door behind her and approached where they had sat up in bed.

"Frisk, I need you to get dressed."

"Wha-?"

"Please, just trust me."

Confused, Frisk quietly climbed from their bed and followed Mila's instructions. She paid no attention to them as they stripped out of their sleepwear and redressed into the only pair of pants, shoes, and shirt that they could call their own. Her focus remained on the closed door, listening intently for any small noise on the other side.

Once dressed, Frisk joined Mila where she stood.

"Mila, what's going on?" They asked, voiced hushed.

The girl was silent for a moment before she answered in a similarly quiet tone.

"I found a way to get you out of here."

"W-what?!" They asked, unable to hide their surprise.

"There's a spot in the basement wall that's weak. One of the rocks that makes up the foundation was coming loose and I've been sneaking down for a while now, trying to get it out. I managed to do it yesterday, so I'm getting you out of here tonight."

"What about the others? What about you?! Can't you come with me?"

Frisk could feel her stiffen next to them.

"I really want to Frisk, but I'm too big to fit."

"Why don't we wait then? We can keep trying to make it big enough. We can-"

It was at this point that Mila gently clasped Frisk's hand. They looked up at her face and noticed how uncharacteristically watery her eyes looked.

"I over heard Him talking on his phone yesterday, Frisk. He's sold me and my new...owner, is suppose to be picking me up in a few days."

Those words made it feel like the floor had fallen out from underneath them.

"Mila-"

"Haven't I always said that you were different, Frisk? That if anyone of us could be free, that you'd do the best?"

Frisk could feel her hand tremble in their own.

"But Mila-"

"It's a really small hole, Frisk, and you're the smallest one out of all of us. You're the only one who might be able to fit. I've told you about how the world outside the House is so different. How this place is the worst that the world has to offer. You've survived longer than anyone still here so...I know you can handle anything the world outside these walls can throw at you. Let me help you Frisk, please. I'll probably never see you again...so just..."

She didn't, couldn't, finish her sentence. Frisk gingerly squeezed at her hand in response.

Mila wiped at her face with her free hand, a small sniffle escaping her as she did so. Once her hand was at her side again, she turned her attention back to Frisk, and a steely look came over her features.

"I think there's still a few Guests in the House, so we'll have to be very quiet, ok?" her voice was steady once more.

"...Ok."

And at their confirmation, Mila made a final wipe at her nose and firmly squeezed their hand, opening the bedroom door and silently slipping into the dimly lit hallway.

There were many rules of living in the House.

Everyone, except for maybe Him, was required to sleep during the day. Rooms were solidly locked and food privileges were restricted for those whose doors showed any signs of tampering. There were set times in which Guests were allowed into the house, with only two hours in any day where you were allowed to wander the halls, though only a small handful of rooms were ever made available to them during that time.

When the House was open for business, anyone found outside of their room, unless with a Guest, was punished harshly. It was the worst rule to break and had the most severe punishment attached to it.

With that in mind, Frisk and Mila were slow and methodical as they made their way to the basement. Luckily for them, it was late in the working hours and the House had been very quiet that evening thus far. It was with that bit of luck that they found their path relatively clear, only having to duck into darkened corners of the halls once or twice to avoid the gaze of a passing Guest.

The basement of the House was always unlocked, but no one ever went there willingly. It served as both a play area of sorts for Guests who liked to roughen things up and as a tool for rule breaking punishment. Frisk had never been down there before for either reason. Unfortunately for Mila, who was constantly in and out of trouble for varying reasons, was well acquainted with the basement.

With a deft and practiced hand, Mila opened the door of the basement silently, slipping herself and Frisk through the small crack, closing the door once they were through. They silently made their way down the stairs, Mila showing Frisk exactly where they needed to step as to not make the stairs creak. Once off the stairs and on solid ground, Mila quickly led them to the far most wall of the room, eyes focused forward. Frisk, however, found their head acting as if on a swivel, the objects in the basement confusing and frightening all at once. They couldn't help but be very glad that they had never seen this place before, despite having lived in the House the longest.

It was only when they reached the wall that Mila finally let go of their hand. She pushed with all her might against a spot of stones at her eye level, the large stone moving bit by bit with every shove.

With one final push, the stone gave way and fell on the ground outside with a low -clack-. They both stood absolutely still for a long minute, ears posed to catch even the tiniest of sounds. Once they were certain the sound of the stone coming loose had not alerted anyone, Frisk approached the wall and Mila boosted them up so that they could climb through the passage she had made. Frisk had expected it to be a tight fit, but there was a moment where pure panic threatened to over take them when they got pretty firmly stuck.

They did their best to wiggle free, causing bits of dirt and dust to fall onto their face.

"Frisk, try and get your right arm all the way extended." Mila's voice was very muffled, but they could still hear her advice.

Slowly, they managed to wiggle their arm out from where it was trapped at their side, catching a whine in their throat as a jagged rock cut into their forearm. Doing their best to ignore the pain, they continued their wiggling until their right arm was free, their hand blindly grasping at the very edge of the hole's other side, their knuckles chilled by the night air. With Mila gently pushing at their feet and their own force pulling forward, Frisk soon found themselves all but spilling from the hole, nearly falling head first into the grass covered ground.

They scrambled to their feet and turned back to the hole.

"Frisk, did you make it all the way through?"

"Yeah, I'm outside!" they whispered back, unable to conceal the excitement in their voice.

In the darkness, Frisk could just make out the features of Mila's face, a big grin that they had never seen her make before now the prominent feature. Frisk smiled just as widely back at her and did their best to reach their arm back into the hole as far as they could. Without prompting, Mila reached her hand towards theirs. They were only just able to touch each others fingertips, but it was enough.

They stayed like that for a moment, silent but happy.

"Stay determined Frisk, ok?" Mila whispered through the hole.

"Mila, I can't thank you enou-"

Frisk was cut off as the sound of a loud scream of anger erupted from deep within the House.

Mila's fingers were suddenly gone.

"Frisk, run!" The terror in her voice was apparent and they did not question her order.

They ran as hard as they could, ignoring the pain in their arm. They ran into the forest, ran through the thickets and brambles that scraped tirelessly at their ankles. They ran in the darkness, doing their best not to trip on the roots and long unkept grasses. They ran until the darkness had ever so slightly begun to ebb into the very beginnings of a sunrise.

They only stopped when their legs gave out from underneath them, their heart pounding loudly in their ears, chest raw from labored breathing. They paused just long enough to catch their breath and wrap a slightly used bandage they had found in the pockets of their pants around the cut on their arm before continuing on, picking up a sturdy stick to help them push aside bushes in the darkness.

They continued on, running when they could, otherwise walking when their legs began to ache too much.

It was in this pre-dawn darkness that they found themselves eventually tripping over a root. They extended their hands to catch themselves on ground that never came, the unmistakable sensation of falling twisting their stomach into an uncomfortable knot.

They fell and they fell for what felt like ages. The shock eventually wore off and they curled in on themselves, hugging their knees to their chest, wind roaring in their ears.

"Oh...I see now." The child's voice roared with the wind, their body materializing next to Frisk's.

"You've had practice with leaving good people behind before."

Frisk clamped their hands around their ears, trying to drown the sound out.

"Asriel wasn't the first you abandoned."

They pressed their fingers into their ears, doing their best to ignore the pain that the action caused them.

"You can't block me out Frisk."

"Please stop."

"No."

"Please! I'm sorry! I'm sorry that I couldn't save her. I'm sorry I couldn't save him! I'm so sorry!"

"No you're not."

Frisk clenched their eyes closed again.

"Please just let me be!"

Their hands were jerked from their ears, the roaring wind mixed with the sounds of their friends' agony and pain.

Frisk, run!

You really do hate me, don't you?

I-I still believe in you!

On days like this, kids like you should be burning in hell.

Oh...what kind of monster are you?

"See, you did call me to remind you how rotten you are. You left that poor girl to be treated like a plaything in that awful house. You left Asriel to rot alone in the Underground as a flower. I'll keep reminding you of these things every night Frisk if you need me to do that for y-"

"PLEASE STOP!" They screamed, opening their eyes just in time to take note of the quickly approaching ground-

Frisk awoke with a start as their head hit the floor of their room with a resounding -Thwap-, legs still up on the edge of the bed and tangled in the sheets. Their chest was heaving, their hairline and neck absolutely drenched in sweat, their whole body achy and trembling.

They instinctively put their hands to their face, touching their clammy skin, doing everything to try and assure themselves that they were actually awake. It took an incredibly long time for their heart to slow its beating, for the voices of their dreams to stop echoing so loudly in their mind. Shaking, they sat up and untangled their legs from the sheets, rubbing at the sore spot on the back of their head. Eventually they stood up and made their way to the bathroom, dimly noticing that their clock read 6:58am. It was still very early in the morning.

They made their way to the bathroom and, using the stool that Toriel had gotten them to have easier access to the sink, immediately turned on the faucet and splashed cold water on their face, hoping that it might wake them up further. The shut the water off and turned their attention to the mirror above the sink.

They stared in the mirror and their tired reflection stared back. They dimly watched as the beads of water trickled down their forehead down their cheek down their neck-

-Your neck looks good enough to eat up.-

An uncomfortable shiver flew down their spine. That was right. That man had said so many weird things to them when they had lived in that house. How could they have forgotten about that?

They continued to stare at their reflection in the mirror, watching the water continue to drip down their face and the tips of their hair that had gotten wet. Taking one into their hand, they twirled the lock around their finger, realizing that this was the longest they had seen their hair in a while.

-I've instructed the owner of this house to keep your hair exactly this length. It suites you best, there's no need to change something about you that I like.-

Frisk could remember how confused they were at the time the man had told them this. Why did it matter what he liked? It was still their hair, right? It being long or short should not have affected him one way or the other.

But, regardless of how many times they fought to let their hair grow longer or asked for it to be cut shorter, its length remained just as the man had requested it to be.

A rage they had not realized was in them began to boil. Quickly digging through the drawers of the sink, they found a small pair of scissors and, with one smooth motion, cut off the lock of hair they had been playing with.

They let it fall to the ground and continued to stare at their reflection in the mirror. They smiled and pulled another chunk of hair away from their face and cut it. They giggled to themselves and did it again. They cut their hair again and again and again and again until their vision grew watery as tears welled up in the eyes.

They sniffled and put the scissors down on the counter of the sink, the sick feeling in their stomach returning.

How could they have forgotten? How could they have forgotten about Mila? How could they have forgotten about what had happened in that house, that awful, terrible place? Had they been so determined to forget about what was done to them that they hadn't realized their chunks of their memories gone? Maybe...maybe they were as rotten as the child in their dreams had said. Maybe they were as bad and wrong as the man in the room had told them repeatedly for so long-

-Didn't you like all the presents I've brought you over the years? Doesn't it seem fair that you give me a present in return?-

Frisk cupped their hands to their mouth, trying to drown out the sob that began to wrack their body.

-Why else would I be doing this? You're a bad child and you deserve bad things to happen to you.-

Frisk dropped off the foot stool and crouched to the floor, tears streaming down their face.

-I'm good and you're bad. I do these things not because I like to, but because I'm trying to help you.-

The man's cruel words repeated in their mind with clarity that they wished wasn't there, their heart ached and gut twisted as they remembered those long, dark hours in that room with him.

-Just do as I say and I won't have to hurt you.-

Frisk could no longer control their sobbing as memory after memory hit them like a brick. They sobbed uncontrollably, no longer caring to notice the way their cries echoed against the bathroom walls.

They sat there, shoulders covered in bits of their own hair, crying unabashedly.

\------------------

Toriel found her self stirring without the help of her phone alarm. She continued to lay in bed, caught between being half awake and half asleep, mind and thoughts lagging as a result.

She dimly wondered what it had been that had awoken her. The birds outside were singing their usual song, the softness of the morning light told her that the sun had not quite risen yet, there was the sound of someone sobbing beyond her door...

She was usually such a deep sleeper, it really was-

Her mind snapped awake as she fully registered the sound of crying. She bolted upright, completely awake and aware.

She listened intently, the sound continuing after only a brief second of silence.

"Frisk?" she asked, climbing from her bed.

She threw her bedroom door open from where it had been cracked open.

"Frisk?" she called, stepping into the hallway and quickly peeking into the child's room. All she found there was there sheets tangled in mess on the floor.

The sound of sobbing turned her attention from the empty room, her head turning towards the bathroom.

"Frisk?" she said once more, knocking on the closed bathroom door. The crying continued without pause from behind the door.

She gently opened the door, shocked by the sight that met her.

"M-my child, what's happened here? Are you alright? W-what's happened to your hair?" She stepped into the room and knelt next to Frisk, ignoring the hair on the floor as she did so. She reached out to gently touch their shoulder, but recoiled at Frisk's reaction to her touch.

"I-I'm sorry! Please, I'm s-sorry! Please." they sobbed, shrinking away from her touch, their body visibly shaking.

"M-my child?" she asked, worried.

They remained silent and continued to shake, their sobbing quieted by sheer force of will.

"Frisk, dear, please tell me what's wrong. Did you have a bad dream?"

The nodded their head from where it still laid pressed against their knees.

"Please Frisk, how can I help?"

"...I d-don't know." It was quiet and shaky, but it was their answer.

"Do you...do you wish to talk about it, my child?"

Their head snapped up, eyes red and puffy, face blotchy. They shook their head violently, saying,

"Please don't make me t-talk about it. Please! I-I'm sorry about the m-mess, I-I'll clean it up, I'm sorry a-about my hair, j-just don't-!"

Their words were cut off as Troiel offered them her hand, her demeanor patient and as calm as it ever was.

"Frisk, my dear child, if you are not ready to talk, that is ok. There's no need to worry about this mess and your hair is yours to do with what you want. Just...please let me know if there is something I can do to help you."

Frisk stared at her, face scrunching into a mess of tears once more as they took her extended hand into one of their own and held onto it for dear life.

"J-Just stay with me for a while, o-ok?"

"Of course Frisk."

And she did. Both of them, Human and Monster, sat in the small bathroom as the sun began to rise, Frisk crying all the while.

\--------------------------------------

In the early afternoon light, Sans found himself in front of Troiel's home, knocking on the front door.

He waited for several seconds before knocking again.

When there was no response a second time, Sans pulled his phone out of his pocket, checking it. He had not missed any calls or texts from either Tori or Frisk saying that they would be out.

With that confirmation, Sans quietly opened the door of the townhouse, slipping his shoes off at the front door, and walked towards the kitchen. He could hear the water running from the sink, a good sign that someone was actually in the house.

"Tori?" he called, making his way to stand at the entrance to the kitchen.

He found Toriel standing at the sink, a glazed look on her face as she slowly scrubbed at the plate in her hand.

"Tori?" he asked again.

She jumped at the sound of his voice, nearly dropping the plate.

"S-Sans! Oh, I'm sorry, I must not have heard you come in!" she said, setting the plate back in the sink, turning off the faucet and wiping her hands with a nearby kitchen towel.

He could instantly feel that something was wrong. The way she stood, the general quietness of the normally bustling home, the fact that Frisk hadn't greeted him at the door.

Sans watched as Tori leaned heavily against the lip of the sink, her shoulders hunched, head hung low.

"Tori...did something happen?" Sans asked quietly, painfully aware of just how tense the air felt.

Toriel was quiet for a moment longer, taking a deep breath before she turned her attention back to Sans.

"Sans...I do not think Frisk is having nightmares just about their time in the Underground."

"What makes you think so?" He asked, stepping more fully into the kitchen with her.

She paused and straightened herself back up, wringing her hands in the fabric of her apron.

"You recall earlier this week, when you and Papyrus stayed the night, how I had to run an errand that following morning?"

Sans briefly remembered the small, hand written note that had been inevitably lost in the pile of blankets once read and set aside.

"Well yeah, you left that note telling us you'd be out."

"The errand I ran was in regards to Frisk's adoption process. The agent I have been working with needed to discuss some things that had been uncovered about where Frisk had come from before they met any of us."

Sans shifted his weight from foot to foot, waiting for her to continue, a heavy feeling filling his chest at the slight change in her tone.

"He told me that...well, what they found was not...the investigation they did turned up..." Tori's hands fidgeted with nervous energy, clasping and unclasping in front of her chest.

Sans continued to wait patiently, happy to give her the time she needed to say what she was doing her best to say. Toriel took a deep, shuddering breath and stilled her hands.

"What they found was awful Sans. The sorts of things that would haunt anyone, let alone a child. When Frisk was first interviewed when we all came to the surface, they had apparently made mention of living in a big house on the other side of Mt. Ebott."

She unconsciously began to clasp and unclasp her hands once more

"The agent I spoke to said that the investigators found it all burned up, burnt human bodies inside...most of which belonged to c-children. That Frisk had no birth certificate to speak of...that they were probably born in that house and that they...they..." Tori was unable to help the weakness in her voice as a lump began to form in her throat.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Sans, I just...the words...I'm having a hard time of thinking how to say all of this-"

"Hey Tori, it's ok. Take your time, I'm not going anywhere."

Without her notice, Sans had moved to stand next to her at the sink, a gentle hand on her forearm snapping her back to attention. She gave him a weak smile, his assurance easing the lump in her throat ever so slightly. She did her best to steel her nerves as she continued.

"The agent...he explained that Frisk was in a very bad situation while in that house, Sans. That they were probably treated more like a...like an object than a person. Like a usable thing instead of a living, breathing child."

She leaned a hip onto the lip of the sink and hung her head once more.

"I woke up this morning to them crying in the bathroom. They had...they had cut their hair. When I tried to even touch them, they recoiled like my hand was made out of fire. They just kept a-apologizing over and over again, they looked so scared, they were shaking like a leaf Sans. I couldn't help them, e-even though I was right there, I couldn't help. I don't know how to help them with the memories that they have Sans. I don't know how to help them at all. I feel so useless...mothers are suppose to be able to help their children with anything and yet, here I am, unable to do even properly comfort Frisk in a time of need."

Her heart ached at the admission of her inability to help. The lump in her throat throbbed in tandem with the ache, her eyes burning with the threat of tears.

"Tori, don't say that, you're not useless. I know we can figure out something to help them-"

"Sans, p-please, I know you want to make me feel better but I...you did not see their face. It was like they were staring through me, right through me Sans. How can I save a child from something only they can see?"

She straightened for a moment, turned her back to the sink, and allowed herself to slump to the floor, her long legs spaying out in front of her, hands folded in her lap. She allowed the few tears that had brimmed in her eyes to fall, tiredly wiping them away. Sans stood next to her, again patiently waiting for her to continue, his eyes sad as he watched her.

"You have to understand that I say these things not out of self-pity or self-loathing. I say these things for Frisk's sake. R-regardless of how much it hurts, it has become painfully apparent that I may not currently be suited to help them through what is paining them. As their caretaker, I cannot remain idle anymore. I know you have done so much to try and help them and I may never be able to express how grateful I am for all of your efforts. But, Sans, we need to concede to the fact that what Frisk is facing may be beyond either of our combined efforts to help them with."

Sans remained quiet as she continued.

"I have set up an appointment for Frisk to see a therapist next week. The adoption agent recommended her highly. He said she has helped a lot of children like Frisk. Children who have s-suffered from intense abuse."

Sans sighed deeply and slowly sat down next to her, his back leaning against the sink cupboards.

"What'll you do if Frisk has to be taken away?"

Tori stared at her hands for a long moment, deep in thought.

"I have had time to think on a lot of things that I would not have allowed myself to think about were I still in the Underground, Sans. I have thought about how I allowed myself to wallow for so many years in grief over the death of my children. How I grieved for so long over all the other humans that fell into the Underground and passed through the Ruins. How I inadvertently abandoned my people as their Queen. How I did everything within my power to hold onto my soured feelings towards Asgore. How I convinced myself that I was right in hating him for the unhappiness I found my life infected by."

A small, sad smile graced her face at this point.

"In allowing myself to truly think on all of these things I've done over the years, I came to the painful realization that I had done all of these things out of selfishness. I did what was best for only myself, even though I had responsibilities to so many others, those choices I made only really had my own interest at heart. I did my best for a very long time in convincing myself that this was not the case. I did a very good job of convincing myself that I was selfless, that everything I did was either for someone else or was inherently the right thing to do for everyone involved. But, now...this is no time nor place for my selfishness. Not with Frisk's well being and health at stake. Though the thought pains immensely, if I am not deemed to be what Frisk needs as a caretaker, then I will happily step aside for whoever is better suited for the job."

Sans couldn't help but stare at her face, her expression still stuck in that sad smile.

"You must really love them, huh?"

Toriel met Sans' eyes, her smile warming.

"I love them dearly. I suppose you could say that I loved them the moment I met them. But, now knowing what their life had been before that moment, I find myself loving them even more. Frisk is a remarkable and amazing child. For someone to have gone through what they did and still show the compassion and kindness that they do is nothing short of incredible."

"Can't help but agree with you, Tori."

She sighed in a contented manner, rubbing at the back of her neck as she did so.

"Thank you, Sans."

"What for?"

"For listening to the concerns of an old woman. It was very relieving to be able to say these things out loud after so long."

Sans gave a little shrug and a wink.

"Don't sweat it, happy to help where I can. But, you know, you don't have to be so hard on yourself Tori...for being an old lady, I personally don't think you look a day over one-hundred."

Toriel couldn't help the fit of giggles that erupted from her mouth at the comment.

Sans found himself laughing too, a warm feeling blossoming in his chest. He found himself enjoying the way she laughed.

"Oh my, how is it that you always know how to cheer me up?"

"What can I say, I'm a multi-talented Monster. But, Tori, if you liked that one, did you happen to hear about the dyslexic man who walked into the bra?"

Another fit of giggles reverberated off of the small kitchen's walls, Tori only managing to stop long enough to choke out her own terrible joke. They sat on the floor like that for a long while, exchanging terrible puns and knock-knock jokes.

Unknown to them, every word of theirs had carried upstairs through the vent in the kitchen ceiling that shared a duct with the floor vent in Frisk's room.

They lay on the floor, their head situated to be as close to the vent as possible, the palms of their hands pressing gently on their eyes. A happy smile was spread across their face, Toriel's words playing in their mind over and over again.

She loved them and had loved them the moment they had met. Despite everything they had been through, despite how awful they felt about themselves, she loved them.

Had they not already cried so much earlier that morning, they knew they would have been crying in joy.

They took their hands away from their eyes and clasped them in front of their chest, a tired grin spread across their face.

Toriel's words had filled them with Determination like they had not felt since they had left the Underground. The lay there for some time after, dimly listening to Sans and Toriel joke back and forth with one another. Eventually, they found the resolve to pick themselves off of the floor and make their way to their bed, the Determination coursing through them keeping them calm and collected as they began a new mantra to sleep by.

My dreams are my own, I should not fear myself.

My dreams are my own, I should not fear myself.

My dreams are my own, I should not fear myself.

They drifted off to sleep, determined to face and triumph over the child who kept haunting them with nightmares.


End file.
